


Miranda Rising

by grrriliketigers



Series: Devil May Care [3]
Category: The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-02
Packaged: 2017-12-07 08:14:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 34,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/746313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grrriliketigers/pseuds/grrriliketigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel/Prequel to Devil May Care and Ghosts of My Girlfriend's Past, Present & Future. Settling into retirement, spending time with her wife and children, reconnecting with her sister, entertaining her dead ex-husband and becoming a fixture in NYU's library of the occult are all parts of a normal day in Miranda Priestly's life as she delves into the question that has always haunted her: why me?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_London, England 1972_

_Miriam hurried down the front stairs, hit the sidewalk and started running._

_Joanne jumped down the front stoop, "Miriam, hold on! Wait!"_

_Miriam didn't wait, she didn't want to hold on. She wanted to get as far as she possibly could from her abusive mother and her stifling house and her backstabbing sister. Tears stung her eyes as she ran. Miriam held her stomach protectively, the other arm pumping as she propelled forward._

_Joanne kept up for as long as she could but she didn't have the same rush of adrenaline, the same drive coursing through her blood. Miriam ran for five blocks before she had to stop and catch her breath. She sunk down against a brownstone, panting heavily. She rubbed her hands over her swollen stomach protectively._

_"Now that you've gotten that out of your system, try and take it easy."_

_Miriam gasped, she turned sharply to her left and lo and behold her Oma was crouched next to her. "Oma..." Miriam stuttered, wanting to reach out and hug the older woman, feel her love and affection, but she knew better. She knew that even Oma was cold to her now. Miriam wiped at her blurry eyes. "I thought you crossed over."_

_"Just giving you your space, liepchen," Oma smiled, "who needs their old Großmutter around while they're trying to grow up into beautiful young adults. I knew there'd be a time when you needed me. I knew that as long as you lived with your mother the day would come that you'd need me."_

_Miriam closed her eyes tightly, squeezing out new tears. She pulled her knees up, wrapped her arms around her legs and buried her face._

_After a few minutes Oma gently said, "alright, Liepchen, time is of the essence," Miriam pushed herself up off the ground and brushed herself off. "I suspected that you may need a quick getaway and I've surveyed the train station for sympathetic employees. There's a man who works there who will let you board a train but his shift expires at six, so we have to make haste, mein Hertz."_

_Miriam pulled herself together as well as could be expected and hurried to the train station. Oma instructed her to queue up, Miriam felt herself near tears at several points during the wait. Finally, she stepped up to the window._

_"Now you may cry, Liepchen. Let him see how sad you are."_

_Miriam scarcely needed Oma's permission. "I need a train ticket."_

_The man's eyes were kind and they softened when they looked at Miriam. "To where, love?" He asked gently._

_"Anywhere." Oma whispered._

_Miriam shrugged, "I don't care. I just need to get out of here. My mother threw me out."_

_The man's eyes widened in concern. "You poor duck. Have you any money?"_

_Miriam felt around in her pockets and pulled out a crumpled fiver. "Let him see your belly, Liepchen." Oma insisted._

_Miriam held up the five and touched her stomach, "just this. Will this cover the ticket?"_

_The man looked as though he might cry just looking at the woebegone teenager looking at him through red teary eyes. "You keep that, you'll need it, I'll cover this. What name should I put on your ticket?"_

_"Mir-"_

_"Fake name, Liepchen." Oma insisted._

_The man looked up expectantly for her continue. Miriam bit her lip and finally said, "Miranda... Priestly."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!4/14/2013 UPDATE!!! I neglected to post chapter three the first go round and now I have added it on to the bottom of chapter two!

New York City, NY, USA, September 2012

Andy was sitting in the kitchen finishing up her coffee when Miranda walked in. Miranda's feet were sheathed in black Manolos, her legs were wrapped in casual beige Fendi slacks, her torso was covered by a sheer floral Hugo Boss blouse and an accompanying black tank top underneath and Miranda completed the outfit with oversized vintage style Fendi sunglasses. Andy grinned, "Miranda, you look fantastic, but who wears a two thousand dollar outfit to a picnic?" 

Miranda pulled her oversized sunglasses off her face and batted her eyelashes at her wife, "someone who is very chic, very rich and very fickle." 

"Check, check and _check_!" Andy laughed, "I guess _you_ wear a two thousand dollar outfit to a picnic and I was foolish to ask." 

Miranda winked and poured herself a cup of coffee, setting the sunglasses down on the counter. 

"I'm glad that you're hanging out with Joanne." Andy said, "now that both of you are retired it'll be perfect for you both." 

"You're just thankful that I'm spending time with someone who I haven't slept with." Miranda snorted as she sipped her coffee.

Andy laughed, "no. I like Joanne, I think she's sweet and I never had a sister but I'd like to think if I had one we could be best friends and I really want that for you." 

Miranda continued to watch Andy. 

Andy sighed and laughed harder, "alright, so I'm a little glad you're not spending as much time with Lucas. Get off my back. You'd be upset too if I was hanging around with Nate or something." 

"I'd be less so if he were dead." Miranda smirked. 

"Anyway, speaking of Lucas, is he going to be joining you today?" 

"No." Miranda downed the last of the coffee and set the mug in the sink. "He has made friends with other deceased persons and now he only comes around at particularly inopportune moments." 

"You miss him."

"A little." Miranda shrugged, "it's hard not to. He spent every day with me for over a year. Of course I'm happy that he has other friends, of course I'm happy that it allows you and I to spend a lot more uninterrupted time together but of course I miss him a little too."

"Honey, if there's one thing I know, it's that Lucas never really goes away." 

Miranda smirked, "you're right and I'll enjoy it while I can," Miranda wrapped her arms around Andy's neck. 

"This is more like it." Andy wrapped her arms around Miranda's waist and held her close. Andy captured Miranda's lips and the kiss started to deepen. Miranda moaned softly into Andy's mouth.

Cassidy entered the kitchen with her hand over her eyes, "not interrupting, just getting an apple." She grabbed the apple with her free hand and as she watched the floor she caught site of Miranda's stilettos. Her gaze travelled up Miranda's legs and torso, she furrowed her brow, "aren't you going to a picnic?" 

Miranda sighed and dropped her arms to her sides. "Do you want me to change?" 

**

The picnic was being hosted by the New York City teacher's association at which all the retiring teachers would be honored. Joanne was among them. It would be the first school year in over thirty years that Joanne would not be returning to the classroom. 

It had taken Miranda and Joanne several months to work out their (Miranda's) issues but Miranda had found that being with Joanne was still easy, familiar and comforting despite the years spent apart. She realized that Joanne was and always would be a part of who she was; Miranda couldn't _not_ love her. Joanne, who had never felt that she had stopped loving her, fell even more easily into the old routine. 

Miranda begrudgingly -- but silently -- allowed Joanne to penetrate her personal space to hug her, wrap her arms around her shoulders, hold her hand, link arms with her, etc. Though it initially made her feel uncomfortable, as time wore on she realized how safe and happy Joanne's attention made her feel, just as it had when she was a child. 

Miranda met all four of Joanne's children and Joanne met the twins. As expected, Joanne's children greeted Miranda enthusiastically with hugs and smiles and the twins looked on skeptically for the first couple of minutes before warming and getting used to the idea of a new aunt. Miranda couldn't blame them for their reaction, up until a week before the first meeting the girls didn't even know that Miranda _had_ a sister. 

Miranda cast a discerning glance at a picnic table before reaching down to brush it off and sitting on the bench. Joanne sat across from her. "I warned people that you'd be with me, so hopefully there will be no excited screaming. I know a fair amount of the teachers read Runway. They can't afford the clothes, but they read it." She smiled. 

Miranda smiled reservedly.

"You do look great, by the way." 

"Thank you. You do, as well, in an off-the-rack sort of way." Miranda teased. "In fact I'd almost actually _like_ the outfit if it weren't for the K-Mart purse." 

Joanne laughed, "this is not from K-Mart!" 

"Oh? Where _is_ it from?" 

"I bought it..."

"Yes?"

"From..." Joanne was laughing. 

"Uh-huh?" 

"Alright, I bought it from a guy selling them on the street." Joanne covered her face with her hands, "I'd just ripped my purse and I needed a new one and there they were. Don't you ever buy anything from street vendors?" 

"You mean other than meth?" 

Joanne laughed embarrassedly, "stop it!" 

Miranda bit into her slice of watermelon and cast Joanne a look. "Go ahead, I know you're going to ask." 

"You're psychic now, too?"

"It's just every time you get that look on your face you're going to say something about mama, so, go on. Out with it." 

Joanne sighed, "I think I felt her presence again last night... she dropped off after you woke up from the coma... I don't mean to say that I'm _sure_ about her having been around but, after you told me that ghosts had a certain feeling I started noticing it... and I feel like mama has been around the last three nights in a row." 

"What do you want me to do about it?" Miranda asked uncomfortably. 

"I just want you to tell me I'm crazy or I'm not crazy or something..."

"Well," Miranda shrugged, "it's not surprising to me if mama is showing up around you because she _was_ attached to you. If she stopped showing up for a while I think it was because she doesn't want to run into me." 

"I feel... guilty for still missing her and loving her knowing all of the things she did to you." 

Miranda put her hand over Joanne's, "you shouldn't, everyone should have a mother that they love and she was good to you and she loved you and that's _okay_. You can love her, she's still your mother." 

Joanne laughed a little, "I think I feel even guiltier now." 

"Don't." Miranda ordered curtly and Joanne didn't feel as if she could -- or ought to -- contradict her. 

They sat silently for a few moments as Miranda finished off her watermelon. A woman wearing a plaid shirt and shorts that came all the way up to her bellybutton stopped in front of Miranda and Joanne. 

"Hi Sandra," Joanne smiled, "Miranda this is Sandra Jones, she teaches Italian and Latin. Sandra, this is my sister Miranda Priestly-"

"Oh, pardon me for interrupting, Joanne, but Miranda Priestly needs no introduction to me. Can you believe," Sandra turned to Miranda, "that when Joanne told us all that you would be here that some of the teachers actually asked ' _who_ '?"

Miranda offered a small smile that did little to hide her disinterest in the groveling. 

"And I know she asked us not to make a fuss but I've been reading Runway since you took it over and I never miss an issue, it hasn't been the same since you left. I was wondering if you'd sign this copy for me?"

Miranda pursed her lips as Sandra produced a recent issue of Runway. She held it out to Miranda and Miranda set it down and flipped the pages until she fell on the Letters to the Editor page and tapped the editor's picture. "This is not one of mine." 

"Oh, I know, it's just the one I have in my purse." 

Miranda flipped the next page and drew a red sharpie out of her purse, "I shan't sign this one, but I will mark it up for errors." She circled a run-on sentence, "and I will sign one of my issues if you can find one." 

Sandra's face lit up, "I'll find you one." She ran off excitedly to relay her exciting news to her other friends. 

Miranda flipped a page in the magazine and drew a big x through the Garnier Fructisse ad and flipped the page with an eyeroll.

"Do you carry around a red sharpie all the time?" Joanne asked.

"No." Miranda quirked a small smile and looked up at Joanne, "I carry two. Just in case." 

"We've been living parallel lives," Joanne smiled, "magazine layouts or term papers. You can separate the sisters but not the habits." 

"Ah, the gift of criticism. Thank you, _mama_." 

Joanne smiled as her mind wandered, her attention brought back at the sound of Miranda tearing a page out of the magazine. 

"You know, Sandra's going to chase me down with back issues of Runway to get me to get you to sign it for her."

Miranda shrugged, "I said I'd do it. I meant it. It's nice that people still remember me."

"Lots of people still remember you." Joanne frowned. 

Miranda turned the magazine around toward Joanne, "clearly my staff has forgotten everything I've taught them because this magazine is atrocious. If Nigel was still at Runway it would never have fallen so far from glory." 

"One cannot live in the past, my dear." 

"Don't think I don't know that," Miranda closed the magazine and let it drop to the table, "but do you have any idea how _difficult_ that can be sometimes? Considering that I'm constantly surrounded by ghosts?" 

"That is true, Liebchen." Joanne popped a grape in her mouth. 

"Do you have plans for the rest of the afternoon?"

"No," Joanne shook her head, "I'm wide open. What did you have in mind?" 

"I want to make a cake for Andrea as a surprise. It's the anniversary of when I hired her at Runway." 

Joanne smiled, "that's sweet. Do you celebrate that every year?" 

"No, I just wanted to this year because Andrea's always giving me a hard time about being inept in the kitchen so I want to make her a cake, but I need you to supervise... because she's right, I am inept in the kitchen."

**

"No!" Joanne cried, reaching out and stopping Miranda's hand. 

Miranda stared at her stunned, not sure whether it was okay to move or not. "What?" Miranda asked finally, tentatively.

"That's baking _soda_ , the recipe calls for baking _powder._ "

"Oh." Miranda saig simply, setting the cardboard box down on the counter. "What's the difference?"

Joanne laughed, "it's not just a subtle difference... they're just not at all the same thing..."

"I don't know if I have baking powder." 

"You do, I saw it in the pantry. I'll get it." Joanne slid off the stool and disappeared into the depths of Miranda's pantry; a room which was bigger than the bedroom in Joanne's first apartment. 

Miranda surveyed the recipe once more and when she looked up she jumped, "Lucas." She snapped, laying a hand over her heart, "is that necessary?"

He shrugged, "you just looked like you were concentrating awfully hard. I didn't want to disturb you."

"I would rather be disturbed than be given a heart attack, for future reference." Miranda patted her chest, "who knows how much I have left in me."

"I told you, I don't think you _can_ die." Lucas argued.

"While it's a lovely theory, I'd prefer not to test it, thank you." 

"Did you say something, Miri?" Joanne called from the depths of the pantry.

"Just talking to Lucas." Miranda called back. She looked at Lucas and smirked, "what do you want?"

"Cut me to the quick, Miranda." Lucas offered her one of his most charming grins. "I just wanted to tell you about this stuff in a condemned house. They're going to knock the house down tomorrow and all the stuff will be lost. So, I think you should go over there and get it."

"What do you want me to do? Load up my Ferrari with antiques?" Miranda rolled her eyes, giving her cake batter a stir for good measure.

Lucas snorted a laugh, "it's not antiques or anything. It's papers and some books that are occulty, they look really old." 

"So, how do _you_ define antiques then?" 

Lucas sighed, "I'm not talking fifty years, I'm talking ancient, relics, written before Latin died _old_. But they're going to knock the house down _tomorrow_."

"I can't go around breaking into condemned houses." Miranda sighed, "and who's to say these books contain _anything_ relevant to me?"

"Because I figured out the title of the one on top and it's called _Book of the Dead_. What if these books have the answers, what if it can explain to you why you can do what you do, what ghosts are made of, if you can tap into any other abilities, what your ability means for the rest of your body, for your _children_. Come on, Miranda, this is the stuff we've been talking about, this is it." He looked at her pleadingly. 

Miranda bit her lip. He was right, it was what they'd been talking about all along, it was the possibility for answers that she'd never expected to get, it was the possibity to _understand_. 

"Oh, but I can't go, I have to finish this cake for Andrea." 

"Can't go where?" Joanne asked, emerging from the pantry with her intended target. She set the baking powder down on the counter and looked to where Miranda was looking, which she could only assume was at Lucas. 

"To a condemned house that has occult books and documents in it." Miranda said. 

"Oh, where is it? Is it in the city?" Joanne asked. 

Lucas nodded, "yeah, it's on Columbia street in Brooklyn." 

"It's in Brooklyn." Miranda relayed. 

"Is it the one that's a thin residential property squished between the bakery and the health food store?" 

"Yes!" Lucas jumped up excitedly. "Yes, that's it!" 

"That's not far from where I live," Joanne said, "I've been reading about it in the paper for years. It was owned by an agoraphobic woman who never left the house and when she was young and first moved in all the buildings around there were residential but since then they've been building it up as commercial properties. Well, anyway, the woman died in 1967 and her son inherited the property and he wouldn't live in it and he wouldn't sell it so it started breaking down and then the son died and no one's owned it since so it passed to the bank and the bank sold it to the city and they're just going to knock it down." 

"They're not going to go in and get those antiques out of there? If no one's lived in it since 1967 and the son never cleaned it out it has to be filled with really great old antiques." Miranda furrowed her brow. 

"Yeah, but it's going to have fallen into ruin by now." Joanne shook her head. "What a waste."

Lucas looked back and forth between the two women for a moment before trying to bring them all back on track. "They're tearing it down tomorrow! All those incredibly old Latin texts will be destroyed." 

"Lucas, I told you, I can't go!" Miranda rolled her eyes. "I'm spending the evening with Andrea." 

"Miranda, what's more important to you? The secrets of the universe or your marriage?" Lucas demanded. 

"Had this been any of my previous marriages I'd be out the door in a heart beat but with Andrea... sorry, Lucas." 

"Oh hell, are you serious?" 

"I could go." Joanne interjected, causing both of the ex-spouses to turn to her in surprise. She nodded, "I know exactly where it is, I'm free this evening, I could go." 

Miranda bit her lip, "I don't know, it seems dangerous to me... without Lucas to have an extra look out... I feel like a crumbly old Victorian brownstone is a bad place to be without a buddy."

Lucas leaned over the counter, "Miranda, get a piece of paper and I'll make a list of all the places to specifically avoid." 

Miranda sighed heavily, "fine." Miranda made the list with Lucas's help and handed it over to Joanne. "You be _careful_." 

"You have my word, Liebchen." 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_After four days and three different modes of travel, Miranda found herself in the heart of Paris. She had quickly found that, with the sole exception of her mother, no one could say no to a pregnant woman._

_She lay in the bottom bunk of her requisitioned youth hostel bed staring at the wire mesh bulging above her as her bunkmate shifted._

_The switch to her new name was easier than she could have imagined. It rolled off her tongue. "Miranda Priestly" as if it were the name she was born to bear. The name was regal, the name was strong and it was the name of someone you definitely didn't want to fuck with._

_And apart from the people she had to charm to get room and board or food, most people did leave her well enough alone. For starters, she didn't really speak French, she'd begun the language course in school but didn't get very far. Also the permanent scowl she wore on her face, the one that accentuated her sharp angular nose, her piercing blue eyes and her full frowning lips, it had a tendency to stop people in their tracks._

_She needed to get a job. Going to Paris had been a whim and now that she was there she was unsure that it was the best idea._

_First thing in the morning she got up and found her way down to the British embassy. She sat down on the steps and waited for someone to walk by. Oma sat quietly by her side._

_When a well-dressed man with a briefcase started up the stairs, she stood up, using her hand against the cold stone to push her into a standing position. The man in front of her stopped and waited._

_"Do you work here?" She asked._

_"I do." The man nodded. "What can I help you with?"_

_"I need a job."_

_"Do you have a visa?" He asked, though he felt fairly certain he knew what the answer would be._

_Miranda shook her head and bit her lip. "My mother threw me out. I'm living in a youth hostel for free but that's only until paying customers need the bed. I don't need to make much, I just need to work."_

_The man sighed, "well, without papers you certainly can't work here. But I might know of someplace. Do you have time to come in for a minute?"_

_"Sir," Miranda smiled, "I have all the time in the world."_

**

"I've read a couple books about tapping into psychic powers." Joanne said as she pulled a box down from a shelf in the old abandoned house. "Not that I think I'm going to be able to do what Miranda does, of course, but I've been learning how to think about, see and feel my surroundings differently." 

Lucas looked over her shoulder as she pulled the box open. It was just cookbooks. Joanne looked through all the boxes just to be sure before putting it away. 

"Because Miranda said that people who can't see and hear ghosts can sometimes _sense_ them and I've been sensing our mother and the last couple of times, I've actually been able to sense you." 

Lucas smiled, "cool." He liked Joanne, she was smart, pretty, sweet and had a good sense of humor, he would have liked to have been able to actually converse with her. 

"The other book I was reading was about auras." Joanne started to cough when a cloud of dust mushroom clouded out from the next box. When the dust cleared and Joanne wiped her eyes she peered into the box. "Have you ever seen the show Hoarders?" Joanne asked Lucas, "I swear, this woman never got rid of anything." 

Joanne pushed the box away with disappointment. She pulled the folded paper from her pocket again and looked it over. "Avoid the bathrooms, check, avoid the kitchen cupboards and by no means touch the refrigerator, check. Floor near the chair looks weak," she glanced up, "yes, it does. Check." 

She tucked the paper back into her jeans. Joanne had already compiled all the books that Lucas had wanted by the front door but proceeded to go through the boxes in case there was anything that he hadn't been able to see that would be important. 

Lucas bit his lip, "please, Joanne be careful." He frowned, watching her blithely hauling boxes down from shelves and dropping them onto the couch. "It's my metaphorical neck if anything happens to you." 

"This is kind of fun, I've always wanted to clean out someone's house that I didn't know." Joanne pulled a sweater out of a box. "Isn't it amazing? There was a woman who lived here in this house, smothered by her possessions and wearing this ratty old sweater." 

Lucas had to smile at Joanne. 

"And like I've said, I spent years reading about this house in the paper, the city has wanted to tear it down for decades. I'm probably the first person to set foot in it in-" There was a low cracking sound. 

Lucas's eyes widened and Joanne froze, looking panic stricken. If Lucas had had breath he'd have held it. "Stay calm, Joanne." He spoke as he moved closer, his voice even and low, "don't panic." 

Joanne was unable to hear him but was having similar thoughts. The floor creaked again and the sound of splintering wood got louder and closer. Joanne gasped and turned in all directions, unsure where the crack was originating from. The last thing she wanted to do was flee from the spot she was in onto a spot that was even less stable. 

Lucas hadn't ever felt more useless. In that moment he wished that he had pushed Miranda harder to go with him or even tried to convince her to steal away in the middle of the night. He wished that Joanne hadn't been so over-eager, he wished that he was able to caution her. 

Joanne's heart pounded in her ears. She took one cautious step forward and the floorboard groaned beneath her, she let out a strangled sob. "Lucas?" She asked, her voice shaking. "Tell Miranda not to blame herself if something happens to me, I made the choice to come here."

Lucas furrowed his brow, unable to accept that anything bad was going to happen. At the same time, he couldn't imagine anything that he could possibly do. He moved closer still. 

"Also, if... something happens ask Miranda to tell my kids that I love them." 

"If the unspeakable happens you can tell her yourself." He laughed nervously. 

Joanne inched forward, her eyes fixated on the door. One of the floorboards near the wall finally gave way with a bang and Joanne screamed as the floor beneath her feet split and splintered in all directions. She reached out for the couch, grabbing at anything that might help keep her on the first floor and out of the basement. 

She took hold of the leg of the couch with one hand and a board with the other. For a few frantic moments the only sounds in the room were Joanne's heavy breath and the sound of her fingernails scraping against the floorboards. Joanne gripped the leg of the couch until her knuckles turned white as she struggled to pull herself up, grunting and groaning. 

Lucas circled her, "come on Joanne, you can do it!" 

With the combined weight of the couch, the boxes and now Joanne, the floor beneath the couch started to sag and crack. She closed her eyes and the couch broke through the dry rotting boards, Joanne scrambled to get out of the way of the couch. 

Lucas peered into the hole, the whole space hidden by a wall of dust. "Joanne?" There were no sounds in the whole house as Lucas strained to see what had happened.


	3. Chapter 3

Miranda's cake sat on the counter on an ornate glass cake stand. Miranda sat behind it on the stool watching it as though she were afraid that it would spontaneously fall apart. Though, Miranda's fears weren't entirely unfounded, most of the things she made in the kitchen looked good for about ten minutes before they fell apart. 

The cake was red devil's food, the middle of the cake was frosted with chocolate and the outside was vanilla frosting and it was covered in coconut shavings. 

The coconut shavings were a clever ruse to distract from the fact that she couldn't frost a cake evenly to save her life. As she stared at the cake she couldn't imagine that she had actually made it herself. She was trying to figure out what ingredient she had left out and how else it may have been screwed up when the front door opened. 

"Miranda?"

"In the kitchen," she called, standing and putting herself between the door and the cake. 

Andy smiled adoringly at her when she walked through the doorframe. "What are you grinning about?" Andy asked as she wrapped her arms around Miranda's waist. 

"Do you know what today is?" Miranda asked as she leaned in and kissed Andy on the lips. 

"Wednesday." Andy laughed. 

"I'll give you a hint, something happened six years ago today." 

" _Six_ years ago today?" Andy furrowed her brow, "I don't think I even knew you six years ago from today." 

"Oh, Andrea, you're on fire, you've practically got it." Miranda grinned. "I hired you on September 7th 2006." 

Andy laughed, "and you remembered?"

"I had to look it up." Miranda admitted, "but I wanted to create a holiday that could take you by surprise."

"Well," Andy smiled, "I'm surprised." 

"I made you something."

"Oh?" 

Miranda stepped back to reveal the cake. Andy smiled and drew Miranda in for a kiss, "if you were any sweeter I'd eat _you_." 

"Did I mention it's from scratch?" Miranda grinned. 

"You're kidding." Andy was stunned, " _scratch_ scratch, like from a recipe?" 

"Don't worry, I promise that it's completely non-toxic. Joanne supervised the ingredients mixing." 

Andy laughed. "You're perfect, Miranda, have I told you lately?" 

Miranda pretended to stop to think, "um... no, I don't think you have." 

"Well, let me show you then..." Andy whispered, her voice lowering as well as her hands. Miranda slipped her eyes shut, a smile quirking the corners of her lips as Andy's fingers began to lower Miranda's zipper. 

"Miranda!" Lucas shouted, appearing in the room. 

Miranda opened one eye and glared at him, she mouthed ' _go away_ ' wishing that her life could just be a little bit normal _for once_ instead of constantly being a three ring circus. 

"It's Joanne, she's hurt." 

Though it physically pained her, Miranda reached down and stilled Andy's hands. She brought them to her lips, "darling, I love you and I hope that you continue to feel the same... that being said, Joanne broke into a condemned old house and has gotten herself into trouble and we need to go help her." 

"Your spidey sense tell you that?" Andy smiled half-heartedly. 

"I will make it up to you." Miranda promised, giving Andy's hands a squeeze and grabbing her car keys. She rushed out the door, Andy at her heels to her new fire engine red Ferrari 599 GTB. 

After the accident her Porsche had been a lost cause. Begrudgingly Miranda admitted that it was time to get a new car -- Carerra wouldn't want her to be sad forever, after all. The car had to be bright and flashy and impossible to miss. Not just because Miranda liked to show off her power and wealth with expensive and luxurious things but because she was now petrified of being hit again. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_The bells rang as Miranda walked into the smokey shop. "Hello? Er, bonjour?"_

_A woman at the other end of the room looked up from a dressmaker's dummy, took her cigarette out of her mouth and furrowed her brow, "I speak English, darlin." The woman said with impatience._

_"I beg your pardon." Miranda furrowed her brow. The woman may have claimed to speak English, but Miranda could only describe the language that she was speaking as_ American South _._

_Miranda crossed the checker tiled linoleum floor, approaching the woman. "I'm Miranda, Mr. Fitzgerald sent me over. He said you might have work for me?"_

_"I'm Alice." The woman said with an air of distrust. She gave Miranda a long once-over and pursed her lips, "you're a good worker? And you can sew?"_

_"Anyone who needs this job as badly as I do is certainly willing to work for her supper. And as for your second question I can only offer you my assurances that I am adequately qualified for this job."_

_"Alright, if you're as high-falutin as all that, why don't I just let you finish this hem for yourself." Alice said as she stood up, though she smiled at Miranda._

_Miranda slid in behind the dress maker's dummy and picked up the needle. Alice slid an ashtray across the counter and flicked a long expanse of spent nicotine into it. "Peter said you're from London and you don't speak French."_

_"I do a little." Miranda corrected, "I understand how to conjugate the verbs in the present, the past and the futur proche. My French vocabulary just leaves much to be desired. Perhaps my accent is a bit poor."_

_"Your accent is kind of funny."_

_"_ My _accent?" Miranda glanced at Alice out of the corner of her eye as she continued to sew._

_"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that." Alice pointed at her. "You don't mess with Texas."_

_"I wouldn't dream of it, ma'am." Miranda smirked, the tip of her tongue protruding as she concentrated on her hem._

_Oma watched over her shoulder. "You have amply deft fingers, dear, but you're cheeky. You'd do to keep a thought to yourself from time to time."_

_Miranda shrugged imperceptibly. "I believe my work shall speak for itself." She said to both her grandmother and the total stranger who watched her scrutinizingly._

_When Miranda finished the hem she sat back and smiled triumphantly._

_Alice walked back over in her slow and steady amble and delicately lifted the hem to her face. "Where is it that you started and where my stitches end?" She furrowed her brow as she looked around the entire circumfrance of the hem._

_Miranda could scarcely keep from grinning. "So. Do I have the job?"_

**

New York City, NY, USA 2012

Andy and Miranda hurried up the front steps, entered the small entranceway and then burst through the front door into the dusty, abandoned livingroom. 

"Joanne?" Miranda called. 

"Down here. Just follow the gaping hole and the remnants of any grace I may have once had." 

Miranda peered into the hole and smiled at her sister, "are you hurt?" 

"I hung onto the floorboards for a little bit before I fell so I didn't have very far to go, but I did something to my shoulder and my foot on the left side. Nothing feels broken." 

"That's good." Miranda stood up from the floor and skirted the hole. "You sit tight and I'm going to find the basement steps." 

"Hi Joanne," Andy's head peeked around the broken boards. 

"Hi Andy," Joanne smiled weakly. "I'm sorry I interrupted your evening with Miranda." 

"Don't worry, I don't blame you." Andy smiled assuringly. 

"Why do I get the feeling that means that she blames _me_?" Lucas asked Miranda as she tried to pry open a door in the kitchen. 

"Because I'm sure she does." Miranda shrugged, "Lucas is this a fool's errand? Make yourself useful and tell me if this is the basement door." 

Lucas disappeared and reappeared. He nodded, "it is." 

"Is there a deadbolt on the other side?" Miranda asked slowly, feeling as though she were talking to a child. 

Lucas shook his head, "no." 

"Okay, Lucas, I have another important question. Other than the black mold, what's the most destructive thing in this house. Are there any ice picks or axes?" 

"Do _you_ keep those things in your house?" Lucas raised an eyebrow at her questioningly. Miranda cast him an impatient glare. "Alright, alright, I think there's a sledgehammer in the study, it's down the hall on the right." 

Miranda made haste to the study, took hold of the heavy, destructive object and went back to the door. "Joanne," she shouted, "I'm going to break the door down, I don't know how close you are to the door but there could be flying wood pieces."

"Liebchen, I fell through the floor with a deluge of wood pieces," Joanne called back, her voice muffled behind the door. "I'm sure I can handle one or two more." 

"Okay, here goes." Miranda gripped the handle of the sledgehammer and swung it as hard as she could into the door. The weight of the hammer pulled Miranda's slender form toward the door, but she had made a large enough hole, not only for herself but also to help Joanne through. The door was probably as rotted as everything else.

Lucas followed behind her, "have I ever told you that I have a little bit of a 'woman and power tools' thing?" 

"A sledgehammer is not a powertool and it has come up, yes." Miranda set the sledgehammer down at the bottom of the steps and knelt down by Joanne. "Can you stand up?"

"Uh... sort of. I think I sprained my ankle." 

"What kind of shoes are you wearing?" Andy asked from the first floor. The sisters and the ghost all looked up at Andy inquisitively.

"Is this really the time for that question?" Lucas looked over at Miranda incredulously. 

"Just sneakers." Joanne answered warily. 

"If you can, switch shoes with Miranda. Hers will lace up really tightly and can hold your ankle in place and you can walk on it pretty well." 

Miranda looked over at Lucas and Lucas nodded, looking somewhat stunned, "yeah, that should work, it'll make it like a temporary brace. I didn't even think of that." 

Miranda started to remove her shoes, "how did you think of that, Andrea?" Miranda smiled. 

"It's an old Miranda-Priestly's-Assistant-Trick passed down through the ages." Andy chuckled, "I walked around for a week on a sprained ankle, held together only by knee-high, skin tight, lace-up Jimmy Choos."

"Well, my Manolos will have to do, won't they?" Miranda said as she slid the sneaker off of Joanne carefully and slid on the $1200 boot. Miranda started to lace the boot up as tightly as she could without cutting off circulation. 

Joanne sucked in a breath through her teeth. 

"Too tight?" Miranda looked up with concern. 

"No," Joanne shook her head, "no... I just realized something... This dust that I've been laying in for the past hour... well, it's not dust." 

"What is it?" Andy asked with wide eyes.

"I think it's ashes... and I have a sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach that they're human."


	4. Chapter 4

Miranda gagged, jumping back. "You're kidding." She demanded, her arm up to her mouth. "Why on earth do you think that?"

"Well, because there's a little thing under my hand and I just looked at it and it looks like bone... and, well, human ashes have bits of bone... " 

Miranda pulled her cell phone from her pocket and flipped it open to use its light to look around the room. "Oh hell," Miranda whispered as she looked around. "There are candles everywhere down here and dead rats and live rats and..." she flipped her phone shut, "we're getting you out of this basement before I have a panic attack." Miranda said matter-of-factly, squatting down to finish lacing up the boots. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Alice showed Miranda to the backroom. She took a drag on her cigarette and indicated the workers. "Any pieces that are going into the show get hand sewn. If their seams are on the inside they get sewn by one of the staff. If they show on the outside, they get sewn by me or my assistant."_

_"Seams on the outside?" Miranda raised an eyebrow. "I can't say I've ever heard that one before."_

_"It's Sonia's trademark." Alice chastized. After a moment of staring her down, she continued, "all the staff -- sauf moi and my assistant -- have work stations in here. We, however, work out front."_

_Miranda nodded, "shall I find myself a work station?"_

_"Well, darlin, I wasn't going to offer you one of those jobs." Alice blinked at Miranda. Miranda looked up at Alice with hurt, her features beginning to be colored by indignation when Alice's face broke out into a grin. "I obviously didn't make myself clear, I'm offering you the job of my assistant."_

**

New York City, NY, USA 2012

An hour and a half later, Joanne's dislocated shoulder had been relocated, examined and released. Andy and Joanne stood on the corner as Miranda went to get her car and pull it around. 

Joanne kept most of her weight on her good foot, using Andy to help stay upright, unaccustomed to the five inch heels. "I'm sorry I ruined your evening." 

"The evening's not over yet," Andy smiled, "it's only 8:30." 

"Did you even get to try the cake?" 

"It'll keep." 

Joanne sighed, "I'm still sorry. I'm sure it's hard trying to spend time with your wife and having all of these interruptions to your life." 

"I don't get upset about anything concerning Miranda anymore. I consider it all a delightful divergence from where I thought my life was going. It's a reminder that life cannot be planned. What I love about Miranda is that you can't really plan for Miranda. And I wouldn't want to because I would miss out on all these things that I couldn't have even imagined." 

Joanne smiled. "She's certainly one of a kind." 

The ferrari pulled up in front of them. "Pile in, I have to have my clothes dry cleaned, my car detailed and I have to get these _sneakers_ off." 

"Hey, don't knock the sneakers," Joanne teased as Andy helped her into the car, "they're orthopedic." 

"That doesn't make them stylish. In fact, I think it basically kills all possibility of style. We need to go shoe shopping." 

"Only with you, Liebchen, does falling through a floor lead to a shopping trip."

**

When Miranda stepped out of the bathroom still toweling off her dripping hair, she smiled at Andy. Andy stood there waiting for her. 

Andy smiled back and lifted a forkful of cake to her mouth slowly. She wrapped her lips around the metal tines and pulled the cake into her mouth. She let out a soft mm. 

"Good?" Miranda asked softly, with a smirk. 

"Mhm." Andy nodded, putting another piece on the fork. "Would you like to try it?" 

Miranda stepped up to her and ran her fingers along Andy's forearm and up to her wrist. She wrapped her fingers lightly around Andy's wrist, her fingers positioned gently over her quickening pulse. She brought Andy's hand closer to her, taking the cake into her mouth. Miranda savoured the cake while gently massaging Andy's pulse point with her thumb. 

Andy let out a shaky breath, "I was supposed to be seducing you..."

"You're forgetting the unspoken rule: the naked, dripping wet woman holds all the cards." Miranda took the plate of cake out of Andy's hand and set it on the dresser. In one fluid motion she shed her towel and pushed Andy onto her back on the bed and straddled her hips. 

"It astounds me how you're halfway across a room before I've even realised you started moving," Andy breathed, her hands moving up Miranda's skin, her sides still slick from her shower. 

Miranda dipped her head to Andy's neck, running her nose lightly over the skin and pressing featherlight kisses along her collarbone. Andy arched her back and groaned. Miranda's hand snaked up Andy's skirt, teasing her through wet panties. 

"God, Miranda, don't tease. I'm dying for you," Andy ran her fingernails down Miranda's back. 

Miranda sat up, straightening her back, staring down at Andy with predatory eyes. Andy cupped Miranda's breasts, rolling a nipple between thumb and index finger. Miranda moaned as she slid Andy's thong down her legs and tossed it onto the floor. 

"Fuck me." Andy trembled underneath her lover. 

"Oh my dear, how can I resist such a heartfelt plea?" Miranda teased as she pushed three fingers into Andy. Andy cried out, wrapping her arms around Miranda. Miranda used her free hand to hold Andy's body against her own while she thrust her fingers in and out of Andy. 

Andy's fingernails dug into Miranda's back as she moaned and rolled her hips against Miranda's fingers. "Yes, yes, fuck" Andy groaned as she squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face in Miranda's neck. 

Miranda moaned, incited by her beautiful young wife, she thrust and pushed, using her hips to push her fingers as deeply as she could manage until Andy's grip on her back intensified and Andy cried out as her orgasm overtook her, riding Miranda's fingers until every part of her body tingled with post-coital sensation. 

Miranda eased her back onto the bed and hovered over Andy. "Thanks for putting up with me."

Andy shrugged and smiled, "when all is said and done, you're no more difficult than I am." 

"I don't know that that's true..." Miranda laughed. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Miranda groaned at feeling the hand gently grab her by the shoulder and, less than gently, pulled her out of her bed. "What?" She rubbed her eyes, trying to focus on the owner of the fingers that were pushing into her scapula._

_"Shh," Alice insisted as she led Miranda out of the room._

_"I'm not even dressed." Miranda objected._

_"There are clothes in the car." Alice assured her, pushing a styrofoam cup full of latte into Miranda's hand. "I have to tell you, darlin, I am getting tired as hell of pulling you out of bed at the hostel."_

_"You could just let me wake up on my own," Miranda suggested, "my alarm clock is set to go off in, well, minutes."_

_"Yes, but you dress too slowly on your own. It is actually much more efficient to simply collect you myself." Alice insisted._

_Miranda had begun setting her alarm earlier and earlier, but it seemed that the only way to avoid being dragged from her slumber by the exigant Texan was not to go to bed at all._

_Miranda didn't know what to think about the last month and a half. Oma crossed over during her first week and Miranda was sad to see her go. Her stomach swelled, there was almost constant motion, though, mercifully, she'd finally stopped throwing up and she'd settled into her job as assistant to an assistant to a designer in Paris. Mornings were conducted like espionage missions essential to the survival of the inhabitants of the free world. In the way that capitalism dominates the free world, Miranda reasoned, in some small way it did matter that Alice chatted away, rattling off her and Miranda's duties for the day and that they got started as the sun was rising. It mattered in the way that if everyone stopped doing it, everyone decided that their jobs just weren't that important... capitalism would break down.In that sense, Miranda truly did get a kick out of her Mission Impossible lifestyle._

_As Miranda was choking down the latte, a beverage she would rather skip, Alice stopped talking._

_Miranda looked up at her, aware that she should have been listening and that Alice had surely said something that required commenting from Miranda. Miranda looked her square in the eye and took her best shot. "I completely agree."_

_"You do?" Alice asked, her voice either surprised or patronising, both emotions tended to be impossible to distinguish on Alice's face. "Well good." The last bit was undeniably patronising and Miranda wondered nervously what it was exactly she'd agreed with._

_By the time the car reached the storefront, the base of operations, Miranda had changed into the day's outfit. Alice was a control freak and Miranda enjoyed pushing against her and challenging her, Alice was, at heart, a warm person and more often than not Miranda earned a playful glare that hid respect._

_Alice let them into the shop, Miranda discarded the latte cup in the trash outside and threw the rest of her things in her box behind the counter._

_"Alright, we'll check on things here and we'll go in about half an hour."_

_"Go?" Miranda furrowed her brow, "we just got here."_

_"I knew you weren't listening to me." Alice announced triumphantly, as if it were anything she hadn't been able to figure out by Miranda's bleary eyed exhaustion._

_Miranda and Alice stared at each other for a moment. Miranda wondered if she'd stop torturing her and just repeat herself or if she was going to have to fight her for the information._

_"Apartment hunting, silly girl." Alice rolled her eyes, "you can't go on living among poor foreigners anymore."_

_"I am a poor foreigner." Miranda smirked._

_"Darlin, you are going to be a poor Parisian by the time the day is through."_

_"I'm an undocumented alien, for heaven's sake. I can't rent an apartment."_

_"Well, darlin," Alice said tapping Miranda on the nose with the envelope she was holding, "if you're nice to me, I just might let you in on my other surprise."_

_Miranda snorted._

_"You take all the fun out of trying to surprise you," Alice groaned playfully, "This isn't the first time I've had undocumented aliens working for me: actually, I tend only to hire undocumented aliens because they work more cheaply and are more grateful for the job. However, it is unsuitable to me to have an assistant who isn't free to move about Europe with me so I had a friend in low places make you up some documents."_

_"Forgeries?" Miranda was wide-eyed._

_"Think of them as temps." Alice grinned, handing over the envelope. "I know that you judiciously changed your name, so it's not as if any of these things will clash with existing documentation, no?"_

_"No..." Miranda emptied the contents onto the counter. The fluorescent bulb hummed as she opened the passport. "You did this for_ me _?"_

_"Mostly for me," Alice quipped, not wanting to waste her time on banalities such as genuine affection, but Miranda got the message loud and clear and she didn't waste her time on the banality of genuine gratitude._

**

Lucas perched on the couch in Joanne's living room as she hobbled in with a cup of tea, careful not to put much weight on her ankle. Miranda had insisted that she keep the Jimmy Choo boots for the time being but Joanne was all too happy to change out of them. After soaking in the tub she wrapped her ankle in compression bandage and made a small dinner. 

Lucas had popped in while she was eating her salad. Lucas smiled when he saw her, Joanne smiled, feeling the energy in the room shift. 

Joanne helped her ankle up onto the coffee table on top of a pillow and picked up her tea. "Lucas, are you there?" 

"Yes," Lucas answered, knowing full well it didn't matter if he answered her or not. 

"Let's watch some telly, hm?" Joanne clicked on the small set. Lucas moved to sit next to her on the couch. She sipped her tea, "I'm going to watch How Clean Is Your House? and that is not subject to discussion."


	5. Chapter 5

Andy was up and out of bed by six, showered, dressed, caffeinated, fed and out the door by ten past seven while Miranda's eyelids first began to flutter open. It certainly was the best perk of retirement, she felt no obligation to get out of bed before eight. 

As editor-in-chief, she'd liked to arrive at the office by 7:30 to scare her employees, spur them on to work. She'd often found that Americans didn't work half as hard as Europeans without putting the fear of God into them. Miranda preferred to put the fear of herself in them, but the idea was the same. After eight, she usually went out for a couple of hours and came back to terrorize and spent the subsequent five hours retraining her incompetent staff. After that, if she had no meetings with the board, she went home to work from there, spend time with her girls and await the book. Between eight and eleven the book was dropped off and her real work began. 

Miranda got up and got dressed. She selected one of her favorite Armani suits and complemented it with a pair of vintage Coco Chanel two-tone high heeled shoes. She felt the way she did every morning after getting dressed: all dressed up and nowhere to go. 

As Miranda started down the stairs Cassidy emerged from her room. "Hey mom. Would you like to come out and get breakfast with me?"

"I would love to, dear," Miranda smiled, "but why don't you save us both some time and just tell me what you want _now_ so we don't have to spend an hour skirting around it nervously?"

Cassidy blinked. "Anybody who thinks you're losing your touch is sorely mistaken." 

"You're deflecting, Cassidy." 

"This guy I've been seeing, well, his dorm is getting fumigated... I wanted to offer to let him stay here..."

"That's fine."

"And I'd like him to stay in my room with me..." 

"You're an adult." Miranda shrugged. 

"Oh my god, mom. You're the coolest mom ever." Cassidy was stunned and excited. 

"I can handle being the coolest mom but not the coolest grandmother, got it?" 

Cassidy laughed as if Miranda had made a joke. Miranda, however, knew that it was easy to get caught up in a moment, it was easy to shut your mind off to sensibilities and it _was_ pretty easy to get pregnant. Miranda was loath to use herself as a cautionary tale, she wanted her name to be synonymous with perfection and good judgment -- that reputation already marred enough by two failed divorces.

"I got it, mom." Cassidy said, her voice bellying the fact that she still found the concept humorous. "So where do you want to get breakfast?"

During breakfast, Miranda didn't deign it necessary to tell Cassidy about the previous night's exploits and the potentially thousand year old books roasting in the late summer sun in the trunk of the Ferrari. She didn't mention the subsequent hospital visit, her first and last encounter with a sledgehammer or the fact that she was going to spend the rest of the day -- if not the rest of her life -- trying to translate latin texts with Joanne. What she did decide was important was learning about Cassidy's beau so she'd know in advance what she was getting into by allowing him to stay over. 

Miranda found out that Cassidy had been seeing Jesse for a little over a month and that he was a political science major, an Aquarius, a dog person, a Pennsylvanian native and flutist. He aspired to be a lobbyist and his favorite color was red. By the end of breakfast Miranda felt as though she could have written the boy's biography. 

Miranda licked her lips, wiping away the coffee that rested delicately on her top lip and set the dainty cup down in its saucer. "I don't think I need to caution you against getting too involved too quickly."

"Mom, I'm 19 and you said-" 

"I don't mean sex, Cassidy. I mean emotionally. There are contraceptives galore but make sure you keep an eye on your heart." 

Cassidy was quiet for a moment. "Like you did? It took you, like, thirty years to get into a marriage you cared about and you went forty years without talking to your sister and she's great, there's nothing wrong with her. I don't want to lose everyone before I'm happy." 

At this point, Joanne, Miranda and Alda were still the only ones who knew what exactly had gone on, everyone now knew that Alda had been verbally abusive but not that Miranda had gotten pregnant and kicked out of the house. Miranda bit her lip and decided how to play this hand. 

"I didn't lose everyone on purpose. It wasn't a choice that I made. I started off very trusting and it got me into trouble." 

"Just because your mother sucked doesn't mean that everyone else was going to screw you over too." 

Miranda picked up her cup again, "I'm not going to argue with you, Cassidy. Just be careful, please, for my sake. Don't make any rash decisions." 

They were silent for a few minutes and Cassidy said, "he's a good guy, mom." 

"I'm not disputing that," Miranda said tiredly, "I've never met him and I can't speak to his character." 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Miranda and Alice were working quietly, as was their normal afternoon routine. Hectic mornings, busy afternoons and relaxing evenings. Miranda was working on an ornate outer seam when something in her stomach started to cramp. Just a little at first, it didn't seem anything to bother about and Miranda wondered, perhaps if she were hungry. After a few moments, maybe seconds later, maybe hours, the cramping intensified and went from a minor irritation to a definite ache and within moments of that it became a piercing pain._

_Miranda cried out, clutching her stomach and gritting her teeth._

_Alice ran to her, "what's wrong?"_

_"I think there's something wrong with the baby," Miranda gasped, trying to remain calm and scream as little as possible. "I haven't felt any kicking in about an hour."_

_Alice put an arm around Miranda, she chanced a look at her stomach and noticed that there was blood soaking into the pants between Miranda's legs. "Come on, darlin, we'll get you to the hospital."_

_**_

_Before Miranda knew it, it was over. Alice sat in her room holding her hand but Miranda felt a million miles away from her. Her baby had been a boy and he'd lived for just under an hour. His lungs were underdeveloped and he couldn't breathe without help. Miranda didn't even get to hold him._

_Miranda was brought back down to earth when Alice brushed hair away from her forehead, "would you like to go home?"_

_"I don't have a home," Miranda shook her head, "I don't belong anywhere."_

_Alice watched her sympathetically. "Come on, then, we'll just take you to that apartment that you rent that's not your home."_

_Miranda quietly complied. She would have been happier to just lay there in the hospital and brood but the doctor had cleared her and she figured she ought to free up the bed for someone with broken bones instead of a broken family. At least broken bones could heal._

_The nurse had told her that malnutrition had probably been the culprit, that even though recently she'd been eating relatively well, the time she'd spent eating poorly had taken its toll on the baby. Though, they couldn't say for sure why her body abruptly terminated the pregnancy._

_She felt lost. She used to have Oma to talk to and then Oma was gone. At least she had a life inside her, two heartbeats in her body, the constant motion of her son both annoying and endearing._

_Since she had planned from the getgo that she would the baby up for adoption, she hadn't had a name prepared for him. When the nurse asked her what name she should put on the death certificate Miranda felt a horrible sinking feeling as her mind reeled._

_"I didn't want this." Miranda said to Alice as she helped her into the apartment. "I didn't want to keep him but I didn't want this."_

_"Of course you didn't, darlin. Nobody thinks you did."_

_"I wished a thousand times that I was pregnant... but this isn't what I meant."_

_"You didn't will this to happen, Miranda," Alice said, almost sternly, "it just happened, life just sucks like that. We lose people all the time and there's nothing that we could have said or done."_

_"Would you stay with me for a bit?"_

_"Of course." Alice said, softening again, "climb on up into bed and I'll make you some tea."_

_The apartment was a studio and the bed was a twin bed in the corner of the room, opposite from the kitchen area. In the middle there was a couch and a table with two chairs. Against one wall was a bookcase and an armoire and on the opposite was the front door. It was as big as a postage stamp but compared to the hostel it was the Ritz._

_Miranda snuggled down under the covers and found herself missing Joanne. The thoughts of her sister causing both nostalgia and acrimony._

_After a few minutes, Alice set the tea down on the chair that she had dragged over from the dining room set. The furniture had come with the place and the table and chairs were dotted with watermarks to the point where one might assume the table was white from a far enough distance. The tea sloshed as Miranda lifted the saucer and tea-cup._

_She sipped the hot tea, it burned her mouth. Under normal circumstances she might have recoiled from the singing liquid, but as it scorched down her throat she felt a sort of cleansing and in that, comfort._

_"If there's anything else I can-" Alice started and before she could finish the sentence Miranda looked up at her with big wet, stunningly blue eyes, she whispered pleadingly, "lay with me?"_

_At Alice's hesitation, Miranda continued, "I just don't think I can be alone tonight."_

_"Of course I will." Alice said with a small smile. "Finish your tea and I'll put it in the sink."_

_The rest of the hot tea was drunk in two gulps and Miranda handed the cup and saucer to the woman fifteen years her elder. "Bitte."_

_The sound of Alice setting the ceramic dishware in the sink and running water into it were the only sounds as Miranda pulled the blankets over her head. Moments later, Alice climbed into the bed behind Miranda and wrapped her arms gently around her waist. Miranda felt Alice's soft breath against the back of her neck and felt Alice's heartbeat as their bodies pressed together in the small bed._

_In the morning Miranda woke up on her own for the first time in a long time. She reached behind her to find that Alice had gotten up and a quick glance at the clock told her that she hadn't come to wake her up as it was rounding on eleven in the morning._

_Without Alice and her car it took Miranda about half an hour to get to the salon. Once in the linoleum floored, fluorescent lit room, Alice looked up. "Miranda, you should be at home, resting."_

_"My job's not strenuous. I sit and sew." Miranda touched her stomach subconsciously. "I just need to work. I don't like being idle and I don't like being alone."_

_"Miranda, you shouldn't be here." Alice frowned._

_"I have to be here."_

_"You shouldn't be here." Alice repeated, loudly, startling Miranda._

_"You left without saying goodbye." Miranda said softly._

_"That's not true." Alice bit the inside of her lip, "I said goodbye, you were just asleep."_

_"Then it doesn't count." Miranda pouted._

_Alice sighed and put her things down. She ran her fingers through her hair. "Please, just go back to your apartment. You can come back tomorrow._ For me _would you please just take today off?"_

 _"For_ you _." Miranda snapped, "but not because I want to."_

_Alice watched the reflection of the light on the floor until she heard the door close behind Miranda. She sighed again._


	6. Chapter 6

Miranda and Cassidy parted company after breakfast, unfortunately, not on the best of notes. Miranda went to the book store and got an English-Latin dictionary and a book on learning Latin. Then around eleven, Miranda invaded Joanne's living room with her purchases, her iPad and the ancient texts. 

Joanne had been expecting her and had set out her laptop and gathered together multiple books on German, French and Spanish that she accrued over a lifetime as a foreign language teacher at a public high school. 

"Should we each take a book or should we work through the same one?" Miranda asked as she set her books on the table with Joanne's. 

"I think Lucas was here last night." Joanne said as she set a cup of coffee on the table for Miranda. 

Miranda shrugged, "doesn't surprise me. He's a very protective person and he wanted to make sure you were okay." Miranda flipped open one of the books, "so, I glanced through the books this morning-"

"I like his energy." Joanne smiled. "I've been reading a book about energies and auras because you told me that ghosts could make us feel a certain way. I like the way Lucas makes me feel." 

Miranda slid her glasses up her nose, "I'm just going to pretend you didn't say that." 

"Miranda, I haven't felt this way since about anyone since Henry died." 

Miranda took her glasses back off and set them down on the table. "I don't think I should have to remind you that Lucas has been dead for almost two years." 

"Is this a jealousy thing?" Joanne asked. 

Miranda couldn't help but laugh. "No, it is nothing of the sort." Miranda shook her head, rubbing the bridge of her nose. "He's all yours, but just know that this isn't _Ghost_ , there isn't a happy ending here. As long as you know that then you're free to have Lucas." 

The sisters were silent for a few moments and Miranda finally put her glasses back on. Joanne spoke again, "you don't have to patronize me." 

Miranda pushed one of the books in front of Joanne, "start tranlating or I'm leaving." 

Joanne accepted the volume begrudingly. An hour later they took a break from their tomes. Joanne picked up Miranda's notebook to read over her progress. "Can I see your book?"

Miranda pushed it over to Joanne, "get it out of my sight." 

"Liebchen, I think you're mixing up the nominative and the genitive cases. And the accusitive and the dative." 

"Does it make a _big_ difference?" Miranda asked with a groan. 

"Unfortunately, yes." Joanne nodded, "because all the nouns are case-marked they can move freely around in the sentence, so the case is essential." 

Joanne looked at the book that Miranda brought with her on Latin grammar. "Oh shoot, I think I'm mixing up the vocative and nominative. German only has four cases." 

"English, French and Spanish don't have case markers so this is entirely foreign to me." 

Joanne bit her lip, "you know what we could do... I don't know if you'd go for it, but..."

"You're worse than my girls. Just say it, beating around the bush won't change my answer to whatever you're going to ask." 

"We could ask Sandra to come over and help. She teaches Latin and she'd be worlds better than either of us.at translating this." 

Miranda stopped to consider the proposition. On the one hand Joanne had a point, someone who had a background in Latin would certainly translate circles around the sisters. Miranda and Joanne would have to learn the language first before they could hope to translate two whole books. On the other hand, letting another person in on the secret could be very dangerous. As usual, Miranda cared less about what people said about her for her own sake than about her daughters' or Andy's sake. 

As if Joanne were listening to Miranda's inner dialogue, she added, "I think that Sandra worships you enough that she wouldn't say anything. And we don't have to tell her that the reason why we're translating it is because you can see ghosts. We could claim a purely academic interest." 

Miranda still hesitated. 

Joanne continued, " _and_ we're both retired and have reputations for being kind of eccentric. Can you imagine shock on anyone's face if you told them you were translating ancient texts?"

Miranda shrugged, "I suppose you make some valid arguments..." 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Miranda had been back to work for nearly two weeks. Her body was still a little sore but she'd since picked up smoking and it seemed to help._

_Alice had been abnormally quiet. Normally an exuberant extrovert, Alice had become broody and introspective. She gave curt one word answers to most of Miranda's questions and gave Miranda directions by pinning a piece of paper onto the garment she was supposed to work on._

_Miranda had been patiently waiting for her to return to normal for over a week before she finally confronted her. Miranda stepped in front of her so that Alice couldn't reasonably distract herself and said, "why are you acting like this?"_

_"I don't know what you're talking about." Alice pursed her lips._

_"You're being a jerk."_

_"_ Excuse _-me?" Alice demanded, wide-eyed._

_"You won't talk to me or look at me and I don't think I'm asking for much but I deserve better than notes pinned to sweaters." Miranda held up one of the offending notes for emphasis._

_"I'm not the one who asked you to crawl into bed with me." Alice snapped._

_"Fine, I shouldn't have asked you to get into bed with me. I can't go back in time and take it back and I won't do it again, okay?" Miranda felt a new surge of annoyance._

_"That's not what I was saying... just,_ god _, forget it!"_

_Miranda rolled her eyes and cast Alice a scorching glare. She pulled her cigarette case out of the pocket in her pants and extracted one of the thin cigarettes._

_"Don't smoke in here." Alice scolded._

_"You do." Miranda said defiantly, putting the cigarette between her lips._

_"_ I'm the boss _." Alice snarled, "and I'm telling you to smoke outside." She pointed to the door._

_Miranda glared daggers at her before turning and leaving the salon. Once outside she felt a few tears slide down her cheeks. She wiped at them distractedly as she walked, she hurried away from the salon, caring less about where she ended up than getting away from the salon and from Alice._

_Finally, she stopped walking when she reached the Parc du Champs de Mars and took up roots on a bench that faced the view of the Eiffel tower. She sighed and touched her stomach out of habit and cursed herself for the slip._

_She sat on the bench staring at the Eiffel tower looming in front of her. She let out a soft gasp of surprise when a rose appeared in her field of vision._

_"Une belle fleur pour une belle, triste femme." A young man slid across the bench to sidle up next to Miranda. She stared at the proffered flower for a long time before he spoke again. "Parlez-vous le francais, cherie?"_

_"Tres peu." Miranda admitted, "je l'apprends. Je suis anglaise."_

_"Ah mon petit, de great country of Britain." His English was heavily accented but he smiled sweetly. "I should like to visit it some time if all ze girls dere are as pretty as you."_

_"Well, there's only one me."_

_"Zen sank goodness I chose you to give the flower, I chose wisely." He held it out closer._

_"Boys are dangerous, I learned that the hard way."_

_He grinned, "cherie, I sink you will find zere is only one me as well and_ I _, petite choue, am harmless. I am really razer nice once you know me. Zere are no strings on zis rose, it is only a rose."_

_Miranda hesitantly took the rose from him and turned it in her hand a few times._

_"Was zat so painful?" He smiled. Miranda shook her head, "now, please allow me to buy you a cafe or a croissant or les deux."_

_"Oh, I see how this works. You hook me in with the rose and then it's coffee and then..."_

_"And zen I should like to give you ze moon if it should make you smile." Miranda rolled her eyes but when she looked over at him his smile was so infectious she couldn't help but smile back -- reservedly._

_"Calm down, let's start with coffee and we'll talk about the moon later if need be."_

_The boy's name turned out to be Etienne and he worked at a restautant as a waiter and he settled Miranda into the corner with a cafe mocha and joined her at the table every ten minutes to dote on Miranda._

_After his shift ended he walked her back through the bustling city streets until they reached the salon. They stood outside. Etienne smiled at Miranda, "may I take you for dinner tomorrow?"_

_"I don't know. My situation... it's complicated." Miranda hesitated._

_"You are seeing someone already?" He asked, she shook her head. "Then there is someone you wish to see more of and aren't yet."_

_"Sort of." Miranda admitted, "mostly I just am afraid to get into anything right now... I just got out of something painful and I don't think I'm ready to get into anything right now." She said as cryptically as possible._

_"But you will keep me in mind if you decide you're ready?" Etienne batted his eyelashes at Miranda. She nodded and waited until he walked away to open the door to the salon._

_Alice's head snapped up. She stood and sauntered up to Miranda, "and where the hell have you been?"_

_"I went for a long walk." Miranda growled, "you made it pretty clear that you didn't want me around. Do you want me to find another job? Would that make you happy?"_

_"You have no idea what would make me happy. How dare you presume to." Alice's voice was low and threatening._

_Miranda rolled her eyes and turned to leave again. Alice grabbed her forcefully by the arm, yanking her back. Miranda's nostrils flared, panic flashed across her face; she lashed out and slapped Alice. "_ Don't ever _grab me like that! Not a thing in this world gives you the right to do that to me._ Nothing _."_

_Miranda's chest heaved, her breath heavy and every cell in her body on high alert. Alice, just realizing the gravity of her actions, watched Miranda nervously._

_"Miranda, I am so sorry." Alice breathed._

_"What the fuck is your problem?" Miranda demanded through fresh tears. "What did I do to you that was so bad?"_

_Alice searched Miranda's face; it mirrored the sadness and near panic in her own, though, undoubtedly, for different reasons entirely. Alice tried to speak but found that she was unable to produce anything._

_Finally, she leaned forward and pressed her lips to Miranda's. Her fingertips brushed Miranda's cheek gently as their lips moved together. Miranda buried her fingers in Alice's dark hair, pulling her close as she returned the kiss._

_Alice started to pull them backwards toward the couch at the end of the room. They didn't make it two feet before Alice's heel got caught up in the throw rug and they tumbled to the floor. The kiss didn't miss a beat, Miranda straddled Alice's hips, grinding down against her. Alice moaned into Miranda's mouth, she ached for release, she ached for Miranda's touch._

_Alice arched against Miranda, her hands snaking up Miranda's blouse. Miranda broke the kiss, sitting straight up, holding Alice's hands to her breasts, her eyes closed and her lips parted in a moan. Alice's fingers kneaded Miranda's firm breasts._

_"God..." Miranda breathed, "yes..."_

_Alice pulled her down for another kiss and they toppled over. Miranda's hands sought out and fumbled with Alice's pants zipper. Panting, Alice reached down to still Miranda's movements. Miranda looked up, white hair falling into her face._

_"We can't," Alice whispered. "Not here."_

_"You're right." Miranda nodded, she kissed Alice softly on the lips. "Come to my flat this evening at seven."_

_Alice nodded breathlessly._


	7. Chapter 7

Sandra arrived at the apartment at five. Joanne ushered her into the apartment, "thank you for coming over."

"Oh, no problem." Sandra smiled, "I would have been here earlier except I had to stop by and pick up a few of my past Runway copies. Did you do something to your ankle?"

"Yeah, I took a bad fall. It's sprained." Joanne nodded. 

"I'm sorry, here, let's get you sitting in the kitchen and off of your feet." Sandra slung her bag over her shoulder and helped Joanne back to the kitchen. 

"I'm mostly alright, Sandra, there's no need to fuss." Joanne insisted as she settled back into her chair. 

Miranda offered Sandra a reserved smile, "hello again." 

"Hello, Ms. Priestly." Sandra grinned and laughed embarassedly, "I'm sorry... I promised myself I'd play it cooler than last time and I've already failed." 

Joanne laughed, "I'd offer you coffee but you don't need the caffeine." 

"We really appreciate your coming over and giving us a hand." Miranda nudged the book closer. "I realize you just got out of work and this is probably the last thing you'd choose to do with your evening..." 

"Oh, think nothing of it. As long as neither of you tell me your dog ate your homework or ask to go to the bathroom in Spanish, I'm happy to do it. I really do love Latin and so seldom get legitimate opportunities to use it." She flipped open the first book. She furrowed her brow as she read down the page. "Where did you say you got this?"

"An estate sale." Miranda lied easily. 

"It's... interesting." Sandra said as she turned the page. 

"Why don't you start translating it aloud and I'll type it up?" Joanne smiled, pulling her macbook closer to her. 

"Okay." Sandra turned back to the front page, "okay, it starts out saying: _Whomsoever reads this volume shall know the secrets of life and death and all that lies between._ " 

For the next hour and a half, Miranda and Joanne took turns taking Sandra's dictation. The text up to that point was mostly religious, discussing implications of the five states of being and what it meant for God's existence and personal involvement in the lives of humans. 

Miranda stood from the table, "I should go. My daughter's bringing a friend home with her this evening and her class gets out at seven." She gathered her things. "Joanne can I do anything for you before I leave?"

"No, I'm good." Joanne smiled. "Give my love to Cassidy."

"Will do." Miranda leaned down and kissed the top of Joanne's head. "Sandra, lovely spending time with you again. Perhaps we could continue tomorrow?"

Sandra beamed, "I think so!" 

"Good, it's a date. I'll see you both tomorrow." 

**

On the way home Miranda stopped at Mangia and picked up dinner. It had been a difficult adjustment, running her own errands again but she muddled through. She was just setting out plates in the kitchen when the front door opened. 

"Something smells delicious." Andy called as she made her way from one end of the floor to the other. "Is this from Mangia? You're a mind reader!" 

Miranda shrugged, "Cassidy is bringing a friend home this evening while the dorm is being fumigated." 

"A houseguest? Is that wise? All things considered." Andy went to the pantry and pulled out a bottle of Merlot. 

Miranda set out two wine glasses and Andy filled them. Miranda took a glass and and sipped it. She shrugged, "I think it'll be okay. It's been pretty quiet around here, especially since Lucas started haunting Joanne." 

"He's haunting Joanne?" 

"Yes." Miranda rolled her eyes, "but to hear them talk about it it's more like courting. Please, help me feel a little saner. It is crazy that they're getting so attached, right?"

"It's more than just crazy, it's batshit crazy." Andy laughed, "how does Joanne even know she's been around Lucas?" 

Miranda shook her head, "I don't even know. I think she's just talking into the silence and she feels like she's not alone. She hasn't dated anyone since Henry died and Lucas is a safe choice."

"As safe as a dead person can be." Andy laughed again, "I can't even believe we're having this conversation. Your formerly estranged sister wants to date your deceased ex-husband. If someone had told me this would be a real conversation I would have I'd've had them committed." 

Miranda wrapped her arms around Andy and pulled her close. "Darling, you're just as sane as I am. Which might be of little comfort." 

Andy grinned, "I take you as you are. Sixth sense and all." Andy brushed her lips against Miranda's, "our situation could get even stranger and I'd still be right by your side."

"Don't say that," Miranda scolded playfully, "you're practically inviting things to get stranger and I don't know if I can handle things getting any weirder." 

"Don't say _that_." Andy snorted, "you're the one who opened the door for the houseguest. If you've ever seen any movie, things always get stranger when you throw a houseguest into the works." 

"He'll only be here for a week." Miranda sipped her wine.

" _He_?" Andy repeated, stunned. 

"Cassidy's friend. Well, boyfriend actually." Miranda set the wine glass down and dug into the Mangia bag, "I think I forgot to get green beans." 

"Hold on, hold on. I'm not done talking about this. Her _boyfriend_ is staying in what room?"

"Cassidy's room." Miranda said casually as she pulled the take-out out of the bag. She looked up to see Andy's expression of shock. "Oh, come on. You lived with your mountain man when you were twenty-two. Cassidy's nineteen." 

"Yeah and my parents were none too happy about it. You are the coolest mom on the planet, aren't you? Aren't you worried that something will happen?" Andy demanded. 

"Oh, Andrea, don't be naive. The minute a mother saying 'your boyfriend can't sleep over' actually _stops_ teenagers from having sex will be the day hell freezes over. Don't give me that look, both my girls got the protection talk and I've taken them to planned parenthood. There's no reason for my daughters to suffer because I'd rather pretend that they're completely uninterested in sex." 

"Just don't let Lucas catch wind of this or I'll never get any sleep." 

Miranda snorted, "how do you figure?"

"Because he'll keep you up all night arguing and I can't sleep without you." 

Miranda brushed her lips against Andy's, "sweetheart, would you do me a favor?"

"Maybe," Andy smiled against her, "what's the favor?"

"Would you cook some greenbeans to go with dinner?" Miranda whispered. 

Andy laughed, "only because I find you completely irresistible even if you are a pain in the ass." 

"Love you." Miranda grinned triumphantly.

"Yeah, yeah, I love you, too." Andy teased. 

"Mom?" Cassidy called. Miranda stole a quick kiss from Andy before walking out to the foyer to greet Cassidy and meet Jesse. "Mom, this is Jesse." 

"It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Priestly." He held out his hand. 

Cassidy elbowed him, "Ms." She hissed. 

Miranda shook his hand, "just call me Miranda. It'll probably save you a lot of future bruised ribs." _Not to mention quite a bit of cringing on Miranda's part._ "It's nice to meet you, Jesse. I've heard a lot about you. All within an hour of learning of your existence but such is the plight of being a mother. Have you two eaten?"

Cassidy shook her head, "no, we just got out of class." 

"I got enough food for everyone from Mangia." 

Andy emerged from the kitchen and walked up to Cassidy and Jesse. She held out her hand for him, "hi, I'm Andy." 

**

Cassidy was sitting on her bed and spreading moisturizer over her face while Jesse brushed his teeth. Dinner had been mostly silent, though throughout the day Cassidy had forgiven Miranda for her breakfast lecture. 

Jesse set his toothbrush down on the side of the sink and laid down on the bed behind Cassidy. She set the tube of Kiss My Face down on the dresser and laid down next to him with a smile. "It's going to be fun waking up with you." She leaned in and kissed him. 

"I have a confession to make." He said, drawing circles lazily on her hip with his pointer finger. "I thought Andy was a guy." 

"You're kidding." Cassidy stared at him. "How did you not know my mother's married to a woman? It was huge news when they got married."

"I'm from out of state and I don't read _fashion_ magazines." He shrugged. 

"What did you think the equality sticker on my car meant?"

Jesse looked at her sheepishly, "I kind of assumed you didn't know what it meant." 

She snorted, "thanks for giving me _no_ credit on that one... so is this going to be a problem for you?" 

"No..." 

"That's a yes if I ever heard one." 

"Cass, don't get me wrong, I have no problem with gay people, I have some gay friends. I just think that marriage is a man and a woman." 

"If by the end of this week my family doesn't change your mind there's no hope for you." Cassidy rolled over on her side, facing away from him but still pressed against him. "And what gay friends do you have?"

"There's Melanie." 

Cassidy laughed out loud, "getting drunk and making out with other drunk women at parties does not make Melanie Claiborne a lesbian. It doesn't even really make her bisexual. Who else?" 

"There was a gay guy on the baseball team with me in high school. I didn't hang out with him or anything, but he was a really nice guy." 

"That's your problem right there." Cassidy said, snuggling into him. "You've never spent any significant amount of time with someone who wasn't heteronormative or closeted. My mother and Andy are in the most love that I've ever thought two people could be, before I knew my mom also dated women I never gave same-sex marriage a thought. You'll change your mind, you'll see." 

**

"Miranda!" Lucas shouted, appearing in her bedroom. "Miranda, wake up!"

Miranda gasped and sat straight up in bed. "What? Lucas? ...what?"

"Miranda get up we have a serious crisis!" Lucas insisted, "come on!" 

She fumbled around on the nightstand for her glasses. She slid them on and started getting up in the pitch darkness of the room. "Is it Joanne? Is she alright?"

"Miranda?" Andy murmured, feeling around the left side of the bed for her wife.

"Go back to sleep, Andrea, I'll just be a minute." Miranda stroked her hair and Andy fell almost instantly back to sleep. 

Miranda went to her closet hurriedly to find clothes and shoes to wear. "Forget that stuff!" Lucas frowned, "it's Cassidy. There's a boy in her bed!" 

Miranda stopped moving and pursed her lips. "I hate you, Lucas." She rolled her eyes, she took her glasses off and set them back down on the nightstand and climbed back into bed.

"You know about this?" He demanded. "You're willfully allowing the deflowering of my princess?" 

"Do you even hear what you're saying?" She rolled her eyes. "Can we have this conversation tomorrow?" 

"No." Lucas said staunchly. "No, we'll talk about this now." 

Miranda sighed defeatedly, "alright." Miranda rolled over and kissed Andy's cheek, "your prophecy came true, darling, I'm going to go argue with Lucas in my office. I'll try to be back as soon as I can."

"Have fun." Andy mumbled. 

Miranda grabbed her glasses again and trudged sleepily into her office. She flipped on the light, settled in her chair, yawned and nodded toward Lucas. "Alright," she said, putting her glasses on. "You were saying?"

"How can you take this so lightly?" Lucas looked even paler than normal for a ghost, as if he had blood to drain from his face. 

"It's not the end of the world, they're nineteen. You were that age once."

"Exactly! And I know what boys his age want, which is why I'm so adamantly opposed to this arrangement."

"Lucas," Miranda rubbed her eyes, "I'm going to tell you something and I want you to promise not to overreact." 

"I make no such promise." 

She sighed. She hesitated but said, "Cassidy's been on the pill for almost two years." 

"I'll kill the bastard! I'll haunt the shit out of him." Lucas shook his head, starting to pace.

"Cassidy's only been dating Jesse for a month. They may not have even had sex yet. It's none of our business and if you haunt either one of them I will never forgive you." 

"That would be a better threat if I wasn't already _so pissed off_ at you for allowing this to happen under your _own_ roof! That's the girl I used to rock in my arms when she couldn't sleep, the girl who cried for her daddy when she broke her arm in gymnastics." 

"Lucas, I implore you to listen to yourself." Miranda attempted to reason with him. "I can imagine that every parent goes through this. When she first asked me to take her to Planned Parenthood to get the pill all I could think about was taking the girls to see the premiere of Finding Nemo and standing in Times Square freezing my ass off so they could get their pictures taken with Spongebob Squarepants. But time and time again both of our daughters have proven to me that they are young women and not naive little girls anymore. We were once that age, too, we were once those little kids who cried for our parents and couldn't understand why cookies weren't an acceptable breakfast food." 

Lucas was silent for a moment.

"So, can we stop having a crisis and let me go back to bed?" 

"What if..." Lucas started, his voice shaking, "what if she got pregnant?"

Miranda sucked in a breath through her teeth. "I will continue to support her in any decision that she makes but I'd prefer to not worry about that particular problem unless we run into it." 

They were silent for several long minutes. Miranda stood up and took off her glasses, "may I go back to bed now?" 

He nodded wordlessly. 

"Lucas, you're a good father and a good person. One of your most attractive qualities has always been your loving, caring nature and how deeply you love our daughters. It's time to just trust them."

He nodded again. Miranda waited to see if he'd speak, but he remained silent. "Alright, I'm going back to bed now." She paused again before shutting off the light and going back to bed, leaving Lucas standing in the dark. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Alice let herself into the apartment and threw open the curtains. Miranda jerked and squinted her eyes at the offending sunlight. Alice stood silhouetted against the rising sun._

_Miranda looked over at the clock and frowned. "You stood me up."_

_Alice sighed, "last night I made it all the way here. I got here at 6:30 actually. I sat outside for two hours. I wanted to come in, darlin, I really did, but I... I just couldn't. I couldn't do it."_


	8. Chapter 8

_Paris, France 1972_

_"The least you owed me was to come in and say it to my face." Miranda pursed her lips. "Instead of taking the coward's way out and running away from me."_

_"You're right. I accept that." Alice admitted, "but please, I want you to continue to work for me but that has to be the extent of our relationship."_

_Miranda shrugged, "fine."_

_Alice set the latte she was holding down on the bureau. "Get dressed. I'll be waiting in the car."_

**

New York City, NY, USA 2012

Miranda and Andy were already bustling about in the kitchen when Cassidy bounced in. "Good morning." She announced, picking up an orange and starting to peel it. 

"Where's Jesse?" Andy asked, sipping from her coffee. 

"He's taking a shower." Cassidy stuffed an orange wedge in her mouth and started to talk again. "Wanna hear something funny?" 

Miranda reached across the table and wiped Cassidy's chin with a napkin, "very ladylike, try to resist talking with your mouthful, Bobbsey. Yes, we'd like to hear something funny." 

"Jesse thought Andy was a man." Cassidy laughed. 

Andy pouted and touched her hair, "I know I took my make-up off early yesterday, but that's just insulting."

Cassidy laughed, "no, no, not last night. Before, you know, because your name's Andy and he's from out of state so he doesn't know anything about anything."

Andy looked like she was thinking about what Cassidy had just said. 

Miranda reached out and took Andy's hand. "Andrea, you could grow a beard and you'd still look like a woman." 

Andy shook her head, "not comforting, not comforting at all." 

Miranda tugged Andy and pulled her onto her lap. Andy giggled girlishly and leaned in to kiss Miranda. Miranda brushed a lock of hair out of Andy's face and nuzzled her before kissing her again. 

Cassidy smiled, unable to imagine anyone not being moved by the affection that Miranda and Andy had for each other. 

"Oh, Cassidy," Andy said, "just aword to the wise, your father had a shit fit last night when he figured out your mother gave you permission to have your boyfriend over." 

Miranda took a sip from her coffee, "I think I reasoned with him but he got quiet and broody and I haven't seen him since. So, I don't know what he's up to." 

"Jesse knows that dad's dead so maybe we should have a code name for him, just in case." 

Miranda resisted the urge to shake her head in amusement. "Why don't we just not talk about him while Jesse's here?" 

"Mom, but what if we _have_ to?" Cassidy demanded seriously. 

"I can't imagine any scenario where it would be life or death to bring up your father." Miranda laughed.

"But mo-om!" Cassidy pouted, her eyes getting wide and lips quivering.

Miranda shook her head and sipped her coffee, "that face would've worked on your father, not me." 

"You just talked about him!"

"Not in a context which in any way implies that I see dead people." Miranda unfolded the New York Times, "don't argue with me." Miranda said just as Cassidy was opening her mouth to rebut.

Cassidy looked over at Andy. "How does she know?" 

"Your mother moves in mysterious ways." Andy stood up. "I'm going to make some bacon, want some?"

" _This_ woman is a mind reader." Miranda grinned. 

"I know the way to your heart." Andy batted her eyelashes, she leaned close and whispered "and a few shortcuts." 

Miranda grinned lecherously. "More than a few, dear." 

A few minutes later Jesse entered the kitchen. He thought of what Cassidy had said the night before and saw that the scene in front of him looked almost exactly like his own parents: his mother cooking breakfast while his father read the newspaper. 

"How did you sleep?" Andy asked. 

"I slept well." Jesse said sitting at the table across from Miranda. "May I read the politics section?" 

Miranda thumbed through the corners until she found the section he was looking for and pulled it out for him. 

Cassidy smiled at how domestic it all felt. 

At 8:30 Andy was off to work; at 9:30 Cassidy and Jesse were off to school and at 10:30 Miranda was ready to head over to Joanne's when she found Lucas sitting in the corner in the foyer. "How long have you been sitting there?" 

He shrugged, "I don't know. Time doesn't mean much to me anymore." 

Miranda lowered herself to the floor to sit with him. "What's wrong?" 

"I was just thinking about what you said last night. That you've watched our girls grow into women. I haven't, I missed all that. I'm still here -- _sort of_ \-- but I'm not really part of their lives anymore and nothing can change that. For the first time I really _feel_ dead. I guess I just don't see the point in sticking around anymore." 

"Lucas, do you remember when you told me you loved me? Well, I love you too. Not in a romantic or sexual way but you're my best friend and I'll always love you." 

"I know, beautiful, but at this point we're just holding onto a past that doesn't want to be held onto." 

A tear slid down Miranda's cheek. "I don't want you to go." 

"I wish I could hold you just one last time." He watched Miranda wistfully, "I never could stand to see you cry." He reached up to wipe away the tear but his touch was ice cold and unsubstantial. The tear dropped from Miranda's cheek to her blouse. 

"Lucas, at least stay for a while until we finish translating the books. You were the one who found them and you should stay to see what they have to say. It's like you said, they could hold the answers, they could tell you what's on the other plane. It always pays to know what you're getting yourself into. You've always wanted to know every possible outcome before you make a decision. Don't you remember all the genetic tests you put us through when we decided we wanted to have kids?" 

He smiled.

"Come on," Miranda said curtly, "just hang around until we're done translating and then I'll support any decision you make. Okay?" 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Another couple of weeks went by and Miranda and Alice passed them without saying anything to each other that wasn't work related. Miranda missed talking to Alice genially and missed enjoying her company. She missed work not feeling like work._

_She had felt that Alice was her friend and without her, Miranda felt rather alone. She had gone out with Etienne three times so she'd have someone to talk to. She had a hard time letting him get close to her without being reminded of all the emotional pain and turmoil she'd gone through for the last boy she'd been close to._

_The work day was nearing its end when Alice spoke, "you're not going out with that boy tonight, are you?"_

_Miranda looked up, stunned that Alice had asked her a personal question again. "No." Miranda answered and then furrowed her brow, "why?"_

_Alice shrugged, "I just thought you might have plans for your birthday."_

_Miranda thought about that sentence for a moment with a furrowed brow, then her eyebrows went up and she said, to her own surprise, "it's my birthday!"_

_"You forgot your own birthday?" Alice smiled, the familiar sense of affection flooding through her veins again. "What kind of a teenager are you?"_

_"I'm still a teenager? Jesus, with all the stuff that's happened, I thought I was at least 50."_

_Alice laughed warmly. "Just 17, I'm afraid." There was a comfortable silence before Alice spoke again, "I'd like to take you out for your birthday."_

_Miranda was skeptical, "I thought you said that we were only to have a work relationship."_

_"It's not unprecedented that an employer does something for her employee's birthday." Alice shrugged as noncommittally as she could manage, "So I want to take you out."_

_Miranda nodded, "okay." She smiled._

_**_

_Miranda and Alice were seated at the restaurant. Alice ordered a mimosa and Miranda ordered a water. Miranda wondered if Alice knew that she had chosen the restaurant where Etienne worked._

_"Can I ask you a question?" Alice asked as she set the mimosa back down on the table. Miranda nodded and Alice continued, "the father of your baby, couldn't he have supported you?"_

_Miranda shrugged, "I never told him. He was the brother of one of my friends and it was a one night stand before he went back to university. I didn't tell my friend either. I knew that I was too young to keep it and I didn't want him to feel obligated to me or the baby."_

_"Would you ever contact him and tell him what happened?"_

_"What would be the point of that?" Miranda quirked an eyebrow. "Isn't that a rather horrible thing to say to someone? 'I was pregnant with your baby and didn't tell you -- but don't worry, you don't have to do anything because he died. You had a son for about half an hour.'_ I _wouldn't want to hear that and know that there's nothing I could have done."_

_Alice shrugged, "I don't know, I can see your point but I think that I'd want to know. I guess I'd want to be there for you so that it wasn't a burden you were bearing alone."_

_"I think some burdens people are meant to bear alone." Miranda said softly._

_"I think that people who feel alone feel that way but you're not alone, Miranda, you have me." Alice reached across the table and took Miranda's hands in her own._

_"I wish you'd stop saying things like that." Miranda frowned as she extracted her hands from Alice's. "You tell me I'm not alone, you tell me that you care for me and then you pull away and you don't talk to me. Either be here for me or don't but don't play with my heart like that. I've already lost one family."_

_Before Alice had a chance to respond Etienne approached the table. "Miranda," he smiled, "you look lovely tonight."_

_"Thanks," Miranda tried to muster up a smile._

_"Here for anyting special?" Etienne smiled charmingly._

_"It's my birthday." Miranda shrugged, hoping to deemphasize the information._

_"Oh, joyeux anniversaire, petite choue!" Etienne's fingers ghosted over Miranda's shoulders, she shivered and closed her eyes. Alice pursed her lips. "I sink zat warrants un baiser d'anniversaire. Si, je puis."_

_Miranda tilted her head invitingly and Etienne lightly cupped her cheek and pressed his lips to hers. She rested her hand on his hip as he kissed her. When he pulled away he smiled at her, both of them missing Alice's icy stare._

_Alice downed the rest of the mimosa and then nudged Etienne twice with the base of the glass. "When you get a minute I'd like another mimosa, garçon."_

_"Of course, madame." Etienne cleared his throat and took the glass from her._

_Alice watched him walk away and when he looked back at Miranda, she was scowling. "What?" She feigned ignorance._

_"That was incredibly rude and out of line." Miranda crossed her arms across her chest._

_"He's a waiter, darlin," Alice said defensively, "that's his job to fetch my drinks."_

_"That is not why you did that." Miranda smirked._

_"If you're such an expert on my motives, Miranda, why don't you explain to me_ why _I did that?" Alice sat back defensively._

_"Can we please just enjoy dinner? I don't want to argue with you. I miss talking to you." Miranda admitted and sipped her water. "I won't talk to Etienne anymore this evening."_

_"Alright." Alice melted at Miranda's openness and sweetness and found it hard to deny her anything. "It's your birthday and I want it to be a good night."_

_Miranda laid her hand, palm up on the table. Alice slid her fingers over the sensitive skin of Miranda's palm and grasped her hand firmly and gave it a squeeze. Miranda smiled slowly and Alice cast her eyes down to the table._

_By the time dinner was over and the two women emerged into the cool night, Alice had put away six mimosas. She wobbled as she reached her car. Miranda put a hand over Alice's, "I don't think you're okay to drive."_

_"Me neither," Alice laughed. She pocketed her keys, "well isn't that just peachy?"_

_"My flat's just a block and a half from here. You could come over until you sober up a little. I could make you some tea." Miranda offered._

_Alice grinned slowly, "what is it with y'all and tea? It's just flavored water."_

_"So is coffee." Miranda pursed her lips defensively, then added playfully, "if you're not nice to me I won't let you come over."_

**

New York, NY, USA 2012

Miranda let herself into Joanne's apartment. "I don't know why it's so much to ask to just have a normal morning." She announced as she closed the door and hung up her jacket. 

"We're in the kitchen." Joanne called. 

"We?" 

Sandra smiled from the other side of the table. "Good morning, Miranda. School was cancelled this morning because some construction company cut our power." 

"Liebchen, I'm e-mailing you the first book, we got it done and I think you're going to be particularly interested in chapter six." Joanne said pointedly. A little piece of her wished that Sandra would leave so she and Miranda could appropriately freak out. Then she felt guilty about wishing away the woman who had made it even remotely possible for them to read the books. 

Miranda pulled up the pdf on her iPad and skipped down past the theology sections and she felt her heart skip a beat when she read the title on the sixth chapter: How to Raise the Dead


	9. Chapter 9

Miranda found herself just staring at the title, unable to read further. She was snapped out of her trance by Joanne offering her a cup of coffee, she accepted it. She took a big gulp, feeling the hot coffee sear down her throat and felt grounded to the moment again. 

Around three, Sandra and the sisters parted company. They had all of the first book and most of the second book completed and Joanne and Miranda were more than a little bit antsy to talk about their discoveries. 

Miranda and Joanne headed for Chez Priestly in the hopes of finding Lucas to get him to agree to Miranda attempting to raise him from the dead. As soon as she'd read the chapter she knew that she was more than willing to try. She needed the girls to have their father, she needed to ensure that her girls had as much love around them as possible. Her girls weren't going to know any of the heartache and suffering that she'd been put through, her girls would always have their family, no ifs ands or buts. 

"Is anyone home?" Miranda called cautiously as she stepped inside. "Andrea? Cassidy? ...Jesse?" 

"Who?" Joanne whispered with furrowed brow. 

"Cassidy's boyfriend, he's staying this week," Miranda whispered back. Miranda let several silent minutes go by, listening for any response or signs of life. "Lucas?" 

Lucas appeared in front of her, still looking downtrodden. "Yeah?"

"We translated the books and there's a way we can bring you back. You'll live to see your daughters graduate college after all." 

"You'll excuse me if I don't get my hopes up." Lucas sighed. "As a scientist I find the notion ludicrous and fanciful. And I think that two women as intelligent and worldly as yourselves should be a little bit less blindly accepting and more thoughtful." 

"Joanne," Miranda said, setting her hands on her hips, "I think Lucas just called us old and foolish." 

Lucas smirked, "you always could translate what I said." 

Joanne pouted a little. "The books were his idea." She mumbled. 

Miranda stepped forward towards Lucas, her voice coming out as a menacing whisper. "I'm going to say this once so whatever ectoplasm you've got shoved in your ears, take it out and _listen_ up. Ever since those two girls were _concieved_ I have made it my duty to see that they get the best of everything and everything they want. Now I might have the opportunity to give them their father back. I can make their family _whole_ again. I will be _damned_ if I let you get in the way of that because you're having a mid-death crisis. Now get down to the basement and keep your mouth _shut_." 

Joanne had scarcely had a chance to see Miranda in full form. She was astonished to see the snarl in her lip and the glare in her eyes, though her voice had remained low and unforgiving, she looked like any sudden movement would cause her to leap and maim, like a wolf on the hunt. Joanne still thought of the timid little girl who cried every night or the cautious, quiet teenager who lived in fear of her mother. Miriam was gone, she had been turned into a hardened, demanding and aggressive Miranda. She could be easygoing, fun and loving but, just like the hulk, you wouldn't like her when she's angry. 

Lucas blinked and didn't dare argue. They may have been divorced for over a decade but the ire in that woman's eyes still struck fear in his heart. 

He gave a curt nod, "I'll meet you in the basement then." He disappeared.

Miranda cleared her throat and smoothed down her blouse. Miranda clasped her hands together, "alright, let's get started." 

The basement was the least frequently used space in the Priestly townhouse. There were four rooms altogether: there was a laundry room which didn't have a washer and dryer because Miranda dry cleaned everything, there was a room full of baby toys, there was a room full of Patricia's things that Miranda hadn't been able to bear getting rid of, and, lastly, there was a room packed high with books. 

The laundry room was chosen for their foray into black magic because it had the most free floor space and had the added benefit of a working lock. 

The things that Miranda and Joanne had amassed in the basement included candles, chairs, a sewing kit, Cassidy's yoga mat, Lucas's urn and Lucas himself. Joanne helped Miranda light the candles and then sat in the corner with Miranda's iPad to feed her directions. 

"Lucas, lay down on the floor and Miranda spread the ashes, as best you can, in the shape of his body." Joanne's heart was pounding, never in a million years did she think anything like this could happen, let alone that she'd be involved in it. She hoped her voice sounded calm and steady. 

Miranda unscrewed the lid of the urn. She got a lurching feeling in the pit of her stomach, she'd always had a relatively weak constitution when it came to blood, ashes and dead bodies. She clenched her teeth and started to spread the ashes. She held her breath as the thin ashes swirled in the air around her. 

When she was done, she stepped back to let the ashes and her stomach settle and to take a breath. 

"The candles are set up instead of the overhead because you'll be sensitive to light for the first 24 hours after your reincarnation." Joanne explained to Lucas. Attempting to explain the procedure as clinically as she could manage did little to slow her heartbeat. 

"Is it time for the blood?" Miranda asked, sounding more apprehensive than she'd wished to convey. 

Joanne nodded. "Yeah." 

Miranda held out the sewing kit and her hand. "You do it." 

"Liebchen, I don't think I can do that..." 

"Please. I can handle pain, but not blood." Miranda insisted. Joanne hesitantly took the sewing kit and extracted a needle. She took a small bottle of hand sanitizer and sanitized the needle. She took Miranda's hand gently and rubbed the pad of her index finger with more of the sanitizer. "Do two fingers." Miranda instructed. 

Joanne dragged the needle down the center of the top of the finger, beads of blood bubbled up from beneath the surface; she repeated the process with the second finger. 

"There. That wasn't so bad." Miranda said as she pointedly avoided looking at her fingers. 

"Now lay your hand over his heart. Don't let your hand fall through him, rest it on top and hold it there until you feel him start to solidify, until your hand is resting on something." 

"How long is this going to take?" Miranda asked as she settled onto the yoga mat that was laid next to Lucas so Miranda's clothes wouldn't be covered in remnants of her ex-husband.

"It doesn't say." Joanne said as she flipped a couple of pages to make sure. 

"It better not be days." Miranda shifted on the mat a couple of times. Lucas wanted to tell her how stupid the whole thing was but new better than to incense Miranda when it came to matters of her children. A little part of him had hope that it would work, a little part of him desperately wanted it to work. 

"Miranda," Lucas started cautiously. She turned to look down at him expectantly, "thank you for not giving up. After we divorced, I used to blame you for giving up on us, I had always felt that we weren't done but now I get it. I think that on some level I knew that we'd be here. I really value being your friend, I'm glad that you took me back, in that regard." 

"I value being your friend, too, Lucas." 

"Is he talking?" Joanne asked, looking up, "he should stay as still as possible until he's completely solid." 

Miranda looked at her watch and sighed. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Once they were inside Miranda's apartment, Alice stretched herself out on the couch. Miranda set the tea kettle on the unit and lit the burner._

_"Miranda," Alice turned around on the couch to watch Miranda, who was leaning leisurely against the kitchen counter. Despite laughing all the way to the apartment, Alice's voice was soft and serious, "come over here and kiss me."_

_Miranda bit her lip and shook her head. "That ship has sailed," Miranda crossed her arms across her chest, "you already told me no, remember?"_

_Alice pouted, "no, forget that, things that I said when I'm sober don't count when I'm drunk."_

_"I think it's usually the other way around. Things you say and do when you're drunk are instantly regretted when you're sober."_

_"I couldn't ever regret you, Miranda," Alice whispered, "my little foreigner with the cockney accent and white hair... the softest lips I've ever kissed."_

_"Stop." Miranda closed her eyes, "please. Just stop. You say these things and you'll take them back in the morning. I need you to stop offering me stability and then taking it away. That's not fair to me."_

_In the tense silence that ensued, the two women watched each other with trepidation. Before either one of them could speak again, the hissing whistle of the tea kettle broke through. Miranda turned and busied herself with mugs and tea bags. "I only have Earl Grey."_

_"That's fine." Alice replied softly._

_Miranda carried the mugs around the couch to hand one to Alice. When Alice accepted it, her fingers brushed Miranda's intimately. Miranda let out a soft sigh and pulled her hand away from Alice._

_"It's just hard," Alice said, leaning back against the couch and looking up into Miranda's eyes. "Reconciling the feelings that I have for you. Back in Texas this would be a hangin offense. So much of me is telling me to just forget about you, that these feelings are nothing but trouble, but when I look at you and when I'm with you, I just feel so elated and I can't imagine how it could be a bad thing. Isn't loving someone a good thing?"_

_Miranda shrugged, "I can't answer that question for you."_

_"Do you love me?"_

_"I don't know." Miranda looked down into the steeping tea. "You make it hard sometimes."_

_"But you could?"_

_"I don't know." Miranda snapped, then softened, "I don't think I could be with someone who's so insecure about their sexuality. I certainly wouldn't ever go out with someone who wouldn't hold my hand in public."_

_"That condition is full of youthful naïvité."_

_Miranda shrugged, "those are my conditions and I'm uncompromising on this point."_

_"What if I got to that point? The point where I was comfortable with myself like that?"_

_"I can't promise I'll wait."_

**

Miranda was so bored that she felt that she might fall asleep. Her hand shook slightly from the effort of holding it up in place over where Lucas's heart should be. Joanne had pulled up the internet and was reading the New York Times. 

Miranda yawned, reaching up to cover her mouth with her free hand. The shift caused her to teeter on her delicate balance. She gasped when she felt her left hand bounce off of something. She looked down at Lucas and her heart pounded in her chest. 

Joanne set down the iPad and watched Miranda's reaction. "Is he?"

"Yes..." Miranda said slowly. Lucas furrowed his brow.

"Okay, we're supposed to leave him alone until he finishes." Joanne watched the spot carefully as she started to gather up the items they'd brought. 

Miranda nodded, "okay..." she followed Joanne out the door without taking her eyes off of Lucas. Once they closed the door behind them Miranda started to gag, "I think I'm going to throw up." 

"Oh, for heaven's sake," Joanne teased good naturedly.

Miranda made haste up the basement steps beelining for the downstairs bathroom. Joanne appeared behind her and got a face cloth out of the cabinet and wet it with cold water. Miranda dry heaved a few times before it became apparent that nothing was coming up. She shut the toilet and sat down resignedly on the floor, leaning against the wall. 

Joanne crouched down next to her and laid the facecloth against her head. "Hold that." Miranda complied. Joanne went to the medicine cabinet and got out a box of butterfly bandages, a cotton ball and rubbing alcohol. She knelt down in front of Miranda and took the hand with the two cut fingers and swabbed them with the alcohol; Miranda didn't even make a sound. Joanne affixed the bandages on the two cuts and smiled. "All done." 

"How can you be so calm when there's a dead man reanimating in my basement?" Miranda asked, her was voice even but betrayed a hint of anxiety and fear.

"Because if I stop to think about it, I'm going to freak out and have a meltdown. Then we'll both just be sitting on the floor of the bathroom crying." Joanne admitted, moving Miranda's white forelock out of her face. "I'm going to get you some ginger ale and crackers to make sure that your stomach settles before you stand up."

Miranda gave Joanne a small smile, "you're very nurturing."

"I'm a mother of four." 

"You were nurturing before you had children. You always took very good care of me."

Joanne gave Miranda's hand a gentle squeeze before she got to her feet, "you're my baby sister." She shrugged, "that was my job." 

"Between the ages of five and ten I used to pretend you were my mother." Miranda confessed. 

Joanne reached down and tousled Miranda's hair. Miranda scowled and swatted Joanne's hand away. Joanne disappeared for a few minutes before she came back with a bottle of ginger ale and a sleeve of crackers. 

Miranda nibbled the edges off a cracker, drank half of the ginger ale and pushed herself up. "I have to take a shower." 

A few hours later, Miranda was still holed up in the bathroom trying to scrub the death off of her skin and Joanne was sitting in Miranda's office waiting for her primadonna sister to get out. She looked at her watch and thought about Lucas. If he reanimated, if what they did... worked... it was earth shattering, it was something that could challenge worldwide beliefs. It was also something that they shouldn't ever reveal. 

Joanne looked at her watch again and sighed. Joanne couldn't imagine what was taking Miranda hours to do. She checked her watch again and sighed, picking up a book from the desk.

**

Lucas felt a tingling sensation in his limbs. He was amazed, he was speechless... his _heart_ was pounding. Miranda had done it. He was a bodied person again. He reached down and felt his chest and then reached up and felt his head. It could have been a trick of the mind, but it meant he at least had a mind to trick again. 

He stood up from the floor and groaned. His back hurt from the concrete and his legs felt a little weak. He opened the door and walked around the basement until he found a mirror. He could see himself in a mirror again. 

He grinned, "not looking too bad for a guy who's been dead for two years." He winked at the reflection. He certainly looked whole again. 

**

Andy let herself in to the townhouse at six, it was an hour earlier than she normally arrived home, but she had already finished for the day so it seemed silly to stick around. She went straight to the refrigerator and pulled out a banana. 

**

Miranda was out of the tub and was drying her hair. Her hair and body had been washed, lathered, rinsed and salved with half the products in the bathroom, stopping only short of Ajax and bleach. 

The perfumy scents of expensive bath products filled the air and Miranda dryed and fluffed her hair through a small hole in the condensation in the mirror. 

She set the hairdryer down and was tightening the towel around her chest when she heard the screaming. "Joanne?" She yelled, rushing out of the bathroom and heading toward the office. 

"Miranda?" Joanne stepped out of the office, looking around. The two women caught up in the hallway, "was that you?"

"No. You?" Miranda bit her lip. 

The scream pierced the air again. " _Miranda_!" 

"Andrea, I'm coming," Miranda called, making haste down to the first floor and running into the kitchen. "Oh my god!" Miranda skidded to a halt when she saw Lucas there, trying to calm Andy down. 

"What the fuck, Miranda?" Andy cried, collapsing into her arms. "Maybe you could warn a girl if you're going to bring your ex-husbands back as zombies." 

Miranda hugged Andy tightly, "I'm sorry, sweetheart, I wasn't expecting you for another hour." She kissed her temple. "Do you forgive me?"

"Of course I do." Andy buried her face against Miranda's wet skin. "I think I'd have to forgive you purely because you defied all logic, physics and science..."

"You think you're surprised?" Lucas scoffed, "I have two PhDs in science and I'm baffled." 

Andy gripped Miranda more tightly and squealed, "it talks, Miranda."

Joanne stood gawking in the doorway. Lucas smiled at Joanne. He stepped forward and extended a hand to her, "I don't think we've been formally introduced. Lucas Gregson." 

"Joanne Kessler." She said weakly as she held her hand up. He took her hand gently in his and leaned down and kissed her hand. Joanne's knees felt a little weak and she wasn't sure if it was because of the kiss, exhileration or sheer terror. 

He turned to Miranda. Andy let go of her and hurried to hide behind her. "Miranda, can I have a hug?" 

Miranda stepped towards him and slapped him across the cheek, "that's for all the things you've said and done in the last two years because you knew I couldn't hit you." He laughed and leaned down and wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off the ground. 

"Lucas, put me down." She squeezed her eyes shut and grimmaced, "I think I'm going to throw up." 

He set her down on the floor. She smoothed out her towel and looked around. Joanne and Andy had crept nearer each other and were still staring at Lucas in total disbelief. "Well..." Miranda said at long last. "Pardon my French but I'm pretty fucking fantastic if I do say so myself."


	10. Chapter 10

"Could I have some water?" Lucas asked, "I'm feeling a little froggy."

"You know where it is." Miranda gestured vaguely in the direction of the cabinets and the sink. "You should probably eat something too." 

For Miranda, the transition between seeing Lucas dead and seeing Lucas alive again was relatively easy. The only thing that looked different to her were the clothes he was wearing, he was now wearing the suit he was cremated in instead of the work clothes he died in. 

She was in awe of the fact that it had actually worked and couldn't believe that she'd almost let the books perish in the rubble. Instead of being fearful and nauseous, she was now overcome with a feeling of accomplishment, she felt like a mad scientist who had just awoken her creation. Miranda felt unstoppable and powerful in a way she hadn't felt since before she retired; she liked it.

The draft from Lucas closing the refrigerator brought her thoughts back to the situation at hand. "Alright. A few things need to happen. The money from your estate is in a trust and we'll have to figure out how to get you access to that. We should check your blood pressure and listen to your heart. You need a new suit and I need to get dressed. I'll be right back." 

Miranda turned to leave and Andy followed after her. "Is this for real, Miranda? Is this really happening?" 

"It seems to be. I suppose I could have had massive blood loss and am hallucinating." She looked at her fingers, "but I can't imagine I lost enough blood."

Andy clutched Miranda's arm, "holy shit, Miranda, this is epic." The two started up the stairs when they heard the front door open. 

"Mom? We're home! Do we have any plans for dinner yet?" Cassidy called as she threw her backpack into the corner. 

Miranda and Andy froze. Andy looked at Miranda, waiting for her to figure out what to do. Miranda just bit her lip and stared toward the sound of the voice. 

Cassidy started up the stairs when she saw her mother and step-mother standing statue-still. "Caught you." Cassidy laughed. "No quickies, we're starving, we missed lunch, okay?"

"I'm going to grab a glass of water real quick." Jesse said, feeling a little uncomfortable standing in front of towel-clad Miranda. 

"No!" Andy cried. Miranda closed her eyes and said a silent prayer. Andy laughed nervously, "I mean, no, hold on, I didn't really get a chance to talk to you last night." 

"I'll be right back." Miranda excused herself and hurried up the stairs. Once on the first floor she ran down the hallway and down the staircase that came out in the pantry, "hide Lucas." She whispered as she emerged in the kitchen.

Joanne was alone in the kitchen. She nodded, "yeah, he heard them and went back into the basement." 

Miranda breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. Go down and tell him that the rest of us are going to get dinner and we'll bring him something back and then go meet Andrea and Cassidy and Jesse in the foyer. I have to go get dressed."

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Alice took a long drag on her cigarette as she examined the piece she'd just finished. She looked over at Miranda, "how's it going?"_

_"I'm almost done." She said, not looking up from the hem._

_"Take your time." Alice tapped the ashes into the ashtray and walked around the counter and picked up the phone. "Bonjour Sonia, comment vas-tu?"_

_Miranda blocked out the conversation as she worked to finish the hem. When she was finished she looked up and saw that Alice had returned to sit across from her. "Darlin, I need you to go down to Sonia's studio. One of the skirts we sent over got ripped by a model who tripped in it and pulled out one of the seams."_

_"I've never been there alone. I've never even met Sonia Rykiel. I don't even speak French."_

_"Oh, quit your fussin, everybody over there speaks English. You'll be fine. Do you remember how to get there?" Miranda nodded. "Good, so you go in through the back because the preview's going to be going on and you won't want to go through the front. Alright?"_

_**_

_Miranda clutched her sewing kit in one hand as she peeked in the back door. The room was well-lit but empty of people. All along the walls were lighted mirrors and dressing stations. In the middle of the room was a dressmakers dummy that wore the ripped skirt. Miranda knelt down by it and started to thread her needle._

_"Qu'est-ce que vous faites ici?" A voice came from behind her. Miranda froze, she wasn't sure whether she should turn around or if she'd disturbed a ghost. "Madame, je vous adresse."_

_Miranda turned slowly, "je suis l'assistant d'Alice." She said apprehensively._

_"Ah, ze brit, oui?" Sonia lit up a cigarette and blew out the smoke away from Miranda. "Here to fix ze skirt?"_

_Miranda nodded, "yes, ma'am."_

_"I'll let you get on with it, zen." Sonia said, but as Miranda bent down to continue working, Sonia stood and watched. After a minute or two Sonia spoke again, "ze hair. Is zat natural?"_

_"Since I was thirteen," Miranda said as she squinted her eyes at the intricate design on the bottom of the seam. "Your model certainly did a number on this seam."_

_Sonia waved a hand dismissively, "unprofessional girl. Now I'm short a model. I may not get to show your beautiful work today."_

_Miranda tied off the hem and stood up, "you have plenty of other examples of my work in the preview, I'm sure."_

_Sonia took a step forward and extended a hand toward Miranda. "May I?"_

_"May you what?" Miranda bit the inside of her lip._

_Sonia didn't wait for actual permission and pulled up her shirt to look at Miranda's stomach. "You could fit ze skirt. Can you walk in stilettos?"_

_"I... you want_ me _to model the skirt?" Miranda gawked._

_"Oh, ma cherie, I can see it now wis your hair. I'll debut ze skirt et vous. Put on ze skirt." She moved to the side of the room and pulled out a tight fitting grey sweater with large black buttons. "And zis sweater. Let me have a look."_

_Miranda did as she was told. The skirt was knee length and met the sweater at Miranda's waist. The sweater had a v-neck and decorative buttons._

_"Cherie, you're a vision. Time to accessorize you." This time Sonia came back a pair of stiletto heels, a big metal hair clip and a string of alternating black and white pearls. "Oh yes, cherie... I sink zis will do very nicely."_

_**_

_The following morning Alice was at Miranda's apartment at nine to wake her up. She pulled the curtains open and Miranda groaned. "You're late. This is what I get for letting you get yourself up?"_

_Miranda put the pillow over her head and tried to wave Alice away._

_"No, I'm not going away." She sat on the bed and pulled the pillow away from Miranda. "How come you didn't come back to work yesterday? Did something happen?"_

_"I would've called," Miranda murmured, "could you just close the blinds and I'll tell you all about it?"_

_Alice laughed and shook her head, "you got it, darlin." She pulled the blinds closed and cast the room into darkness again. "Now, shoot."_

_"Sonia made me model the skirt that I fixed last night, then-"_

_"What did you wear it with?"_

_"Uh, I wore it with the grey v-neck with the buttons." Miranda explained._

_"Oh cute! But the preview ended at nine, why are you so tired?" Alice furrowed her brow._

_Miranda reached up and put a finger over Alice's mouth, "_ darlin _, if you'd let me finish a sentence... Then Sonia took me to the after party. She spent most of the evening touching my hair and asking other people to touch my hair. Also, I never even imagined that the punch would be spiked."_

_"Did they make you do anything you didn't want to do?" Alice asked with concern, taking Miranda's hand._

_"Other than keeping me out until three in the morning? No." Miranda swung her legs over the side and groaned. "Didn't happen to bring me a latte this morning, did you?"_

_"I thought you didn't like coffee." Alice teased, holding the latte in front of Miranda._

_"With this headache I'm going to have to go straight to the hard stuff." Miranda sipped the coffee, "I think I'm starting to get a taste for it."_

_"Are you too hungover for work?" Alice stroked Miranda's hair gently._

_Miranda shook her head, "no, I think I'll be okay after the coffee and I splash some water on my face."_

_"Why don't you take a nice long bath. We don't have a deadline anytime soon since the preview's over. You took one for the team last night and the least I can do is let you take the morning to yourself."_

_"Are you sure?"_

_"Absolutely. You take your time and I'll be back to pick you up at noon." Alice smiled at her._

_Miranda smiled at the brunette and thought about kissing her; she really wanted to. She was so beautiful and she was being so sweet. Miranda just nodded, "thank you, Alice."_

**

When the entourage returned from dinner the teenagers went upstairs to get ready for bed and the adults all snuck into the basement. Miranda had had to lie about why she wanted an extra entree; she'd said she wanted it for lunch the next day because she didn't cook. Cassidy had seemed to be a little bit skeptical of the excuse, considering on a good day during her tenure at Runway Miranda may have had three lunches ordered and two to three of them thrown away if they weren't hot enough. Cassidy seemed to have accepted the excuse. 

"Lucas?" 

"I'm in here." He called from the room with the books. He had a few books stacked up next to him and he held one in his hand, "I need my glasses."

Miranda handed Lucas the food and took the book from him., "I let the kids choose the restaurant, don't blame me if you don't like the food." 

Lucas laughed, "beggars can't be choosers, M." He opened the box and closed his eyes, smelling the food. "I haven't smelled food in forever... this smells amazing. What is it?"

"Seared scallops, snap and English pea risotto with caper brown butter." 

"Miranda, this is amazing." He grinned, shoving a forkful into his mouth.

"Lucas, we have to talk about something though." Miranda started slowly. He looked up at her and finished the bite he was chewing. "You can't stay here. Cassidy's boyfriend is here for the week and I can't keep sneaking into the basement without alerting suspicion." 

"So, what? Because some douchebag that I already don't like is staying over you're kicking me out?" Lucas demanded. 

Miranda rolled her eyes, "I never invited you to stay. It was different when no one else could see you, but you haven't lived here since 1995. Also, I think we should wait to see how you hold up until we tell Cassidy about you." 

Lucas nodded, "yeah, I understand that. But, Miranda, be reasonable, it's not like I have anywhere to go." 

"You could stay with me." Up until that point, Andy and Joanne had been silently hanging back. They had both had a little time at dinner to come to grips with what had happened and Joanne was almost beginning to feel like the situation was normal. 

Miranda, Andy and Lucas stared at Joanne. She smiled, "obviously he can't stay at a hotel and if he can't stay here he should stay with someone else who _knows_." 

"I can't argue with that logic... but for some reason I feel the desire to." Miranda narrowed her eyes at Joanne. "I don't know if this is such a good idea." 

"It's a perfect idea, Miranda." Lucas insisted. 

Miranda thought about it again and looked over at Andy, "something about it feels wrong. Do you know what I mean?"

"Sort of." Andy nodded. She had an idea of why it felt wrong to Miranda. "But I think that until we get things sort of taken care of it's the best option." 

Miranda nodded grudgingly, "okay. You should leave out the basement door so you don't have to go back through the house." 

After Joanne and Lucas had left, Miranda and Andy went back up the stairs and emerged in the kitchen. Miranda took one step and almost ran into Cassidy. 

She closed the refrigerator door. "What were you doing in the basement?" 

Miranda held up the book that she was still holding, "I wanted to find a book." 

Cassidy nodded slowly, looking at the book in her hand. "I have another question for you: where's the food from Traif?" 

"Your aunt took it home, she wanted it more than I did." 

"Aunt Joanne left through the basement? _Why_?" 

"Because we were down in the basement looking at the books and it was just as easy to leave that way." Mirand rolled her eyes, "Cassidy, for heaven's sake, give it a rest tonight." 

"You guys are up to something weird. All three of you. Andy's developed a twitch, look at her." Cassidy gestured to Andy. 

She laughed nervously, "I've always had a twitch, Cass."

Miranda put her hands on Cassidy's shoulders and looked her in the eye, "Cassidy Marie, I can assure you that the _three_ of us are not up to anything."

Cassidy pouted, Miranda's voice and eyes belied her sincerity and Cassidy had been sure that she was right. "Alright... and I guess Andy has always had a twitch... I guess I'm going to go up to bed now." 

Miranda kissed Cassidy's forehead, "sleep tight, Bobbsey." 

When Andy and Miranda heard Cassidy's footsteps on the stairs Andy let out the breath she was holding. "I don't have the strength of character for this... God, that kid is so smart, she's going to figure us out." 

"Are you kidding? You think the thought that we've raised her father from the dead is going to be the conclusion that leaps to her mind?" Miranda whispered. "What's going to give us away is the fact that you couldn't lie to save your life." 

"That's why I went into journalism and not into fiction writing." Andy grinned.


	11. Chapter 11

"My mom's doing something weird." Cassidy said as she closed the door behind her. "I mean, she's always doing something kind of weird... I mean, she grew up in two different foreign countries so she's got some of these weird sayings and weird customs or whatever. But I think this is a different weird something. She and my Aunt Joanne are always doing something but Andy's in on this one and she's almost never in on the weird things. Didn't you see how nervous she was at dinner?" 

Jesse shrugged, "I don't know, I don't know your family as well as you do. I can't really speak to any supposed nervousness or weirdness. I defer to your expertise." 

Cassidy laughed, straddling his hips, "god, you are such a politician." 

"You'd vote for me?" He grinned, nipping at her lips.

"I don't know, you never really seem to say where you stand on the issues..." she teased. 

**

Miranda was standing in front of the mirror brushing her teeth. Andy put her toothbrush away and turned to Miranda, "so do you want to talk about why it feels wrong for Lucas to be staying with Joanne?"

Miranda spit her toothpaste out and rinsed the toothbrush, "what do you mean?"

"I mean, I have my suspicions about why it feels weird to you and I want to see if you've had the same thought." 

Miranda furrowed her brow and started to take off her make-up. "I don't know. Why don't you tell me your theory first?"

"Alright." Andy grinned, pulling herself up to sit on the counter, "you're jealous."

"Absurd!" Miranda retorted immediately. 

"I mean, not like I think you want to get back together with Lucas or even sleep with him, but I think it bothers you that Joanne wants him." 

"Yes, it bothers me that Joanne wants him but not because I'm jealous. Not because if I can't have him no one can. It bothers me because up until ten hours ago his body was in a ceramic urn in Cassidy's room." 

"Yeah, but Miranda-"

" _Shit_." Miranda cursed, throwing down the make-up wipe and starting to pace the bathroom. "Cassidy's room..."

"What?" Andy was unnerved by Miranda's uncharacteristic cursing and subsequent erratic behavior.

"The urn was in Cassidy's room, I never put it back." Miranda said in a hissed whisper. "It wouldn't be an issue if she wasn't already so suspicious... she's going to know it has something to do with Lucas and then, you're right, it's only a hop, skip and a jump from there." 

"No, Miranda, you were right, she's not just going to assume you raised him from the dead." Andy insisted.

Miranda bit her lip. "But she could suspect it and she'd get it out of you in five minutes flat."

"I think I'd be more insulted by that insinuation if I didn't agree with it so whole-heartedly..." Andy sulked. "Maybe one of us could put the urn back tomorrow before she notices it's gone." 

"Unless she already noticed it's gone, or if seeing it in its rightful place again makes her realize it wasn't there for a while." 

"Or we could be completely overreacting."

Miranda stopped pacing and turned to look at Andy. "Need I remind you that that girl has half of my DNA? And that the other half is Lucas's?" 

Andy sighed, "you're right. We're fucked. She's as good as figured it all out already, hasn't she?" 

"We need a counter-strategy." Miranda agreed, nodding.

**

"Okay, I would like you to take the bed." Joanne said after Lucas had finished his dinner. "And I'll take the couch."

"No, I won't hear of it. I can't put you out of your bed." Lucas waved off the idea. 

"The couch is pretty comfortable." Joanne shrugged, "and you haven't slept in two years, I think you should have the more comfortable bed." 

"Joanne," Lucas smiled charmingly, "I'm not going to argue with you. I'm not letting you sleep on the couch." 

Joanne took a deep breath and then smiled back, "if you won't argue, how about a compromise? What if we both slept in the bed?" She felt herself blush, "it's large enough for both of us and I want you to sleep in the bed, I don't want to let you sleep on the couch." 

"You don't have to share your bed with me." 

"Do you not want to?" Joanne bit the inside of her lip.

"I didn't say that..." he responded softly. "In fact, I think I'd like that very much." 

"Me too..." she admitted, looking up into his eyes. She laid her hands over his chest. "I just can't believe that you're here, that you're real, that I can touch you." 

"I wouldn't believe it myself if I weren't living it." He attempted to keep his breath steady as Joanne's hands roamed freely over his chest and shoulders and were starting up his neck. 

Joanne's fingers moved gently over his neck and up to cup his cheeks. He smiled weakly at her; she smiled shyly at him. She started to lean up, he started to lean down and their lips met somewhere in the middle. 

**

Andy was awoken by the sound of her phone ringing. She frowned and picked it up, putting it to her ear, "hello?"

A few minutes later Andy shook Miranda's shoulder gently, "hey, Miranda?"

"Hmm?" Miranda groaned. 

"I have to go in to work for a few hours." 

"You're kidding." Miranda pulled off her sleep mask. "It's Saturday. Have they no sense of decency?" 

"You used to make me go in on Saturdays." 

" _I'm_ a sadist." Miranda pursed her lips. 

"And I'm a masochist." Andy covered Miranda's lips with her own. 

"We're the perfect couple," Miranda murmured against Andy's lips. "You won't be long?"

"Hopefully not." 

**

By the time Andy was showered and out the door Miranda was ready to go, too. She taped a fifty to Cassidy's door with a note that told them that they should get breakfast. Miranda dropped Andy off at the Mirror and then pointed the Ferrari toward Joanne's apartment. 

She called Joanne and they arranged to meet at the diner around the corner from the apartment. 

"Lucas was still sleeping." Joanne explained after they'd ordered their coffees. "I didn't want to wake him, he's probably exhausted.

Miranda's feathers were already ruffled because she couldn't get a latte. She snorted her understanding and sipped the coffee flavored hot water that had been set in front of her. The only thing that quelled her rage was the fact that the food was served very promptly and it wasn't greasy like she'd expected it to be. 

"I don't understand how you eat that all the time. Aren't you worried about your cholesterol?" 

"I have pills to worry about my cholesterol for me." Miranda said as she finished chewing her first bite. 

Joanne laughed but shook her head as she started in on her egg-white omelette. 

"Anyway, I called this meeting because I think we should check Lucas out. I have a blood pressure contraption and we should listen to his heartbeat. We can't do the sophisticated tests but I'd like to do some of the smaller ones, at least. Who knows what could be wrong with him." 

"Well, I can tell you he doesn't have erectile dysfunction." Joanne said devillishly. 

Miranda pushed her plate away, "that's it. I'm done eating. Forever." 

"No, come on, Miranda. We didn't sleep together, well, we did _sleep_ together but we didn't have sex. Just, you know, in the morning it sometimes _happens_. We did kiss though. A lot." 

Miranda shook her head, "unbelievable..." 

Joanne took Miranda's hands, "no man has made me feel this way since Henry died. Miri, can't you be happy for me?"

"Up until now I would have said that you were the more sensible of the two of us but... but this is just ridiculous. Have you forgotten that he's _dead_?" 

"He _was_ dead. You brought him back."

"Yeah, don't worry because that's an exact science." Miranda rolled her eyes. She softened and gave Joanne's hands a squeeze. "Joanne, I'm not trying to be unhappy for you, I would _love_ to be happy for you, but I just can't because I don't believe that this is going to end well." 

Joanne considered this for a moment before looking back up into Miranda's eyes and defiantly declaring, "you're just jealous."

"You think I'm _jealous_?" The word was spat more than spoken and Miranda stared at Joanne with incredulity. 

"Yes, I do." Joanne nodded, "you're jealous because he was all about you for so long and now he's spending time with me and you miss the attention he used to give you." 

"Oy gevalt, Joanne..." Miranda rubbed her eyes wearily. "I just think that it's foolish of you to jump in with both feet when we don't even know if his incarnation is permanent. I don't want you to get your heart broken. You've only dated, what, two men?" 

"You think that just because I haven't had five divorces and wasn't promiscuous as a teenager that I don't know what heartbreak feels like?" Joanne's eyes were wide with ire. "I watched my husband of twenty-six years die slowly from cancer. I didn't leave the house for weeks and I couldn't stop crying for _months_ and you don't think I don't understand heartbreak?" 

"Liebchen, I didn't mean it that way." Miranda attempted, trying to take Joanne's hand. She still wasn't quite used to having to apologize for or explain her words. Quite frankly, she wasn't very good at it. "I'm just afraid that you're going into this with blinders on. I'm afraid that you think because we rose Lucas from the dead that he won't ever die. I'm afraid that he might not stay alive and I don't want that for you." 

"Following one's heart should never be contigent on hoping that the other person doesn't die. We should all be fortunate enough to have someone more than half our age in love with us." Joanne said pointedly. Miranda pursed her lips. "I could say similar things to you, Miranda, I could say that you chose Andy because she's so much younger than you and you won't have to go through her death." 

"Maybe I will, maybe I won't. Life has no guarantees. We can't know." 

" _Yes_. Which is exactly why I plan keep seeing Lucas. We can't know what's going to happen, he could outlive us all. I can't tell my heart that it can't have him just because it might be fleeting. Can't you understand that?" Joanne asked, Miranda remained begrudgingly silent. "He makes me feel so good and so young and I just want to hold onto that feeling forever." 

Miranda sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Miranda walked to work at eleven and when she got there she was surprised to see Sonia Rykiel talking to Alice._

_"Zere she is." Sonia smiled, "ze belle of ze ball. You were a huge hit last night, cherie. You were ze epitome of beautiful. Alice tell Miranda how beautiful she is."_

_Alice smiled, "you're beautiful."_

_Miranda set her bag down in the corner, she was unsure of why Sonia was there. Part of her was leary to approach the two older women, afraid that she would be whisked off and be kept up until three again. She remained silent._

_"Would you stand here in ze middle of ze room?" Sonia asked, pointing to the stand for the dressmaker's dummy._

_Miranda silently complied. Her long white hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail. Sonia stepped up onto the stand with her and pulled her hair out. She stood back and smiled, "I just cannot get enough of ze hair. I got a little tipsy and I got a little handsy, didn't I, cherie?"_

_Alice stiffened. Miranda smiled uncomfortably, "my hair's never gotten so much attention. Well, not positive attention."_

_"Cherie, I shan't beat ze bush. I want you to be ze face of my winter collection. I want to start an ad campaign wis your face and I want you to be at every preview and showing."_

_"Oh, Mme Rykiel..."_

_"Appele-moi Sonia, cherie."_

_"Sonia, this is so... unexpected and it's so generous... I don't know if I..."_

_Sonia held up a hand to stop her with a smile, "cherie, I know how much you get paid here and I sink ze raise you'll get for ze job change will settle sings in your mind." Sonia held up a check, "zis is for last night for allowing me to hijack you and for saving my winter collection."_

_Miranda lost her breath when she looked down at the check. It was more money than she'd ever seen in one place. Miranda looked back up at Sonia._

_Sonia took one of Miranda's hands, "Miranda, cherie, I want you."_

_Miranda looked over to Alice. Alice smiled weakly. "You should take the job, darlin, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity."_

_"She's right, cherie."_

_Miranda nodded, "alright, yes. I'll be your model."_

_"Cherie!" Sonia grinned happily, she kissed both of Miranda's cheeks, "you shall be unstoppable. I'll wait outside in ze car, you can gazer your effects and meet me, oui?"_

_Miranda nodded. Sonia's departure from the salon was signified by the bell and Miranda looked over at Alice. She wanted to say something but she wasn't sure what there was to say._

_"I'm happy for you." Alice whispered._

_Miranda stepped down from the stand and took one step toward Alice. "You don't look very happy."_

_"I didn't say that I was_ happy _." Alice sighed, "I just said that I was happy_ for _you. I'm going to miss you."_

_Miranda stepped up and hugged Alice, laying her head against her collarbone. "I'm going to miss you too."_

_Alice closed her eyes and stroked Miranda's hair gently._


	12. Chapter 12

Cassidy and Jesse were up and dressed around ten, when they exited the room they found the money and Miranda's note. 

"Fifty dollars? Does she think we're going to be eating diamonds for breakfast?" He laughed. 

"Yeah, my mom's a little out of touch with the world." Cassidy grinned, "but on the bright side we can splurge or save some for later. Just let me grab my purse." 

She disappeared into the room and when she came back holding her purse, she looked pensive. "That's weird." 

"What's weird?"

"My yoga mat is gone..." She bit her lip in thought, "didn't I use it yesterday morning? To do some stretches?"

Jesse shrugged, "I was in the shower, I don't really know. Maybe you left it at school by accident? Or would your mom or Andy have borrowed it?"

"Yoga is way too peaceful for my mom. She has a treadmill upstairs in the attic. I guess Andy could have borrowed it... Nah, I'm sure I must have left it at school." Cassidy waved it off, though there was still a small nagging feeling in her stomach that told her that something was amiss. "But wait, if my Aunt Joanne took the extra food home last night why did my mom order it?" 

"Cass, don't you think you're being a little overdramatic? You yourself just said that your mother is out of touch with the world." 

"My mother can be domineering and controlling but at least her motives are usually clearer." Cassidy bit her lip. "My mother's doing something weird... I don't know _what_ yet but I'm sure she is."

**

Miranda and Joanne entered the apartment. "I'm going to go put on a pot of coffee. Would you go wake Lucas?"

Miranda walked down the hall to the bedroom. Lucas was sprawled out on the bed, sound asleep. Miranda clapped her hands loudly, "rise and shine." Lucas gasped and shot up. She dropped the take away box in his lap. "Here's your breakfast."

He opened it, "this looks like a Miranda breakfast." 

"Yeah, I couldn't finish it." Miranda said coldly, crossing her arms across her chest. 

He looked up at her, "are you mad at me?"

"Yes." Miranda said, pulling the blood pressure monitor out of her Gucci bag. "I want to take your blood pressure before you have coffee." 

"Why are you mad at me?" Lucas asked as he held out his arm for the blood pressure test. 

"Lucas," she sat down on the bed next to him to read the test. "I'm only going to say once that I think your getting involved with Joanne is foolhardy, at best, it's reckless and irresponsible."

"Why?" Lucas frowned, "I like her. She's a good person, she's sweet and she makes me smile." 

"One twenty over eighty." Miranda took the monitor off his arm and put it back in her bag. "It's normal." 

"Stop ignoring what I'm saying to you." He frowned, "you're not going to at least have a conversation with me about it?"

"No, because I'm not going to change my mind." Miranda was already on her way out of the room, "why don't you put the rest of your clothes on and join us in the kitchen?" 

"Hey, hold on a second." Lucas jumped up from the bed. "We're divorced, you have no control over me. Don't you remember you said that you don't care who I see naked as long as it isn't you or Andy?"

"You've seen Joanne naked already?" Miranda's eyes were wide. That didn't sound very much like the conservative Joanne that she knew. 

"No, not yet, but I'd like to. I've liked her ever since I first met her, Miranda, I feel like I'm falling so hard. You got your second chance at love -- actually, you seem to get unlimited chances... and you _are_ my best friend and I want you to be happy for me. Joanne makes me happy. She makes me feel like I could be the man that I'm supposed to be."

Miranda sighed, "you always could wax poetic when the situation called for it."

Lucas smiled, "only this time I'm not trying to talk you into letting me back into bed." 

"Yeah, but somehow I'm still falling for it..." Miranda let out a frustrated groan, "okay. I won't put up anymore of a fuss but I still feel the same way, Lucas. I think this is a bad idea to get attached just yet." 

"Duly noted. Thank you for your blessing."

"I didn't say blessing, don't put words in my mouth." 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_"Tiens! Miranda!" Etienne called after seeing a swish of the tell-tale white hair. Miranda turned and saw him dash across the street. "Miranda, it's been so long. I went to ze salon and ze woman zere said zat you don't work zere anymore. Zen two weeks later I see your face... every where, you are all over ze place. You look beautiful."_

_"Thanks." Miranda said, tucking her hair behind her ear, "yeah, I'm sorry that I haven't been accessible, my work schedule keeps me kind of full up. I never thought that modelling would be such a full-time job."_

_Etienne smiled, "I just missed you but you seem happy."_

_Miranda nodded, "I think I am mostly happy." Miranda pulled the coat more tightly around her, "are you busy right now? I'm going to a Christmas party and you could come with me."_

_"I wouldn't dream of imposing."_

_Miranda linked arms with him, "nonsense. It's just a party with a bunch of models and fashion designers and some writers. People crash these functions all the time."_

_At the party, Sonia greeted Miranda with cheek kisses and after Miranda introduced Etienne, Sonia greeted him with cheek kisses as well and instructed both of them to enjoy the party._

_"Would you like punch?" Etienne asked._

_"See if you can find me water. The punch is usually alcoholic." When Etienne wandered off in search of beverages, Miranda turned to Sonia, "I was just wondering, do you know if Alice is here? Or if she's coming?"_

_Sonia furrowed her brow and thought for a moment, "I believe she is spending the holiday elsewhere, I sink she went to Bordeaux."_

_"Oh." Miranda nodded, disappointed, "thank you."_

_They were joined by a couple of friends of Sonia's. One of them reached out and touched Miranda's hair, "I just love it. And Miranda, you're so tin, how did you achieve ze perfect weight?"_

_Miranda shrugged, "I was poor and homeless..."_

_The women laughed, "Miranda, you're too much." The tallest of the bunch, someone to whom Miranda was never actually introduced, "if Sonia ever lets you go, you have a job at Chic."_

_Chic, it was a French fashion magazine, the woman must have been Pierrette Follet, the wife of the editor-in-chief. Miranda smiled, "thank you."_

_Sonia put an arm around Miranda, "ze girl is free to make her own choices."_

_Miranda wanted to look up at Sonia and ask 'am I?' but found herself unable to form the words. She smiled at Sonia, she was grateful that Sonia had taken such an interest in her and in her career but sometimes she wished that she'd just faded into faceless anonymity in London. The lifestyle wasn't what she would have chosen, she didn't really do parties, she preferred to make an entrance and then leave. Sonia had a habit of keeping her by her side as though she were a trophy wife. In a way she was, Sonia paraded her around and all the men and the women felt free to touch her hair, her clothing, her arms, her shoulders as though she were a window-front mannequin._

_Etienne returned, "I found water." He smiled triumphantly, "it wasn't easy but I found it."_

_"You're a saint." Miranda accepted the water and kissed him. "Etienne, this is my boss Sonia Rykiel and the editor of Chic, Pierrette Follet."_

_"Enchante, monsieur." Pierrette held out her hand and fanned herself with the spare when he took it gently and kissed it._

_Apparently it was youth in general that got their engines running. Miranda smiled to herself. Around midnight Sonia took Miranda by the arm with a smile, "I can imagine that you and your beau would like to get out here as quickly as possible. You should go enjoy your holiday evening. Joyeux Noel, cherie."_

_**_

_Miranda's new apartment had a large open concept living room, an updated kitchen, a bedroom and a bathroom with a clawfooted bath tub. She flipped on the lights and Etienne looked around the room, "not bad digs." He laughed, "I live in one room above ze restaurant and share a basroom wis two ozer guys."_

_Miranda shrugged, "I didn't ask for it." She sat down on the couch, "Sonia didn't like my old flat, she said that it didn't suit me."_

_Etienne joined her on the couch, "I'm glad zat you've done so well for yourself."_

_Miranda cast her eyes downward, "it's an amazing opportunity... it's certainly lucrative. I've met so many people and I feel like I'm never alone... but somehow it's lonely." She looked back up at Etienne, "isn't there a saying that you're never as alone as when you're in a crowd?"_

_"If zere isn't, zere should be." Etienne nodded. "I've missed you zis past month, I've wanted to see you a hundred times."_

_Miranda cupped his cheek and leaned in to kiss him. Their lips touched, gently at first until they both grew bolder and the kisses grew more insistent.Miranda pushed him back until she could comfortably straddle his hips._

**

New York City, NY, USA 2012

"Miranda?" Andy called again, "sweetie?"

"Hm?" She looked up. "Oh, sorry, I was just thinking about Joanne and Lucas. I just don't want either of them to get hurt. What if he doesn't live past the day?" 

"I know, sweetheart." Andy insisted, "I know, but when two people like each other there's almost nothing anyone can do to convince them it's stupid. You said my mom threatened to haunt you if you pursued me." 

"But that was what made your mother loveable." She said sarcastically, "No, she later told me that I had her blessing... I think if she'd hung around longer we could have been friends, I think we were growing on each other."

"I think you have a hard time relating to the living." 

Miranda laughed, "I think that what I like about the dead is that they don't treat me like fragile, yet deadly, time bomb. They're not worried that I'll ruin their careers if they so much as sneeze in my presence. What I like about them is that they can be themselves because they have nothing left to lose."

"That's the enigma that is Miranda Priestly," Andy said and Miranda quirked an eyebrow. "You want everyone to be afraid of you but you only _like_ the people who stand up to you." 

"That is the common misconception about me, Andrea." Miranda smiled, "I want everyone to do their jobs. I just usually have to scare them into doing it because people are _lazy_ and the people that I don't have to scare, the people who aren't lazy, those are the people I like and respect."

"Fair enough." Andy grinned as she laid her legs over Miranda's lap. "Works in my favor, I guess."

"Oh, you think so?" Miranda grinned devilishly as she started to tickle Andy's feet. 

Andy burst out into uncontrollable giggles. "Mercy! Mercy!" She yelled as Miranda mercilessly attacked her feet. 

"I can't hear you!" Miranda insisted as she continued to tickle. 

"I give up! You're the best and I am scared of you!" 

"That's right," Miranda smirked as she let Andy's feet go. Andy's laughter trickled off as she smiled at her wife. 

"Hey mom," Cassidy called as she and Jesse entered the room, "that show is coming on that I was telling you about." She turned on the television and turned it to TLC.

"What's it called?"

"It's called 'A Haunting,'" Cassidy turned the volume up and sat down on the couch next to Miranda and Jesse sat down next to Cassidy. "It's so cool because they reenact these hauntings that people have in their houses." 

About halfway through the program Miranda couldn't take the absurdity of it any longer and protested, "that is ridiculous." 

"This stuff is documented, mom."

"By whom? The people to which it happened?" Miranda smirked, "do you ever notice that these hauntings seem to only ever happen to catholics who go to a priest to have it exorcised? It's theatrical, it's just a television show."

"I'm with you, Miranda." Jesses announced, leaning forward, "I think that educated people believing in the notion of ghosts is just ignorant. It's just a religious superstition of demons and the devil or it's someone trying to hold on to someone they love and miss." 

Cassidy was outraged by Jesse's spiel, evidence of which was written all over face. "I think that it's ignorant of you to spew that crap without having anything to back it up! That's not how science works, you can't just say I can't wrap my head around it so it's bullshit." 

"What are you talking about? There's tons of evidence that ghosts don't exist, they have all those shows where people debunk ghosts."

"If I may play devil's advocate for a moment," Andy interjected, "those are also television shows and they're just filling a market. You want to watch a show that debunks ghosts, Cassidy wants to watch a show that proves ghosts exist. They might even be produced by the same company." 

"Where do you stand on this issue, Andy?" Jesse asked.

"I stand on not getting in the middle of it. Which is a lesson that you should learn pretty quickly when dealing with the Priestly women." Andy smiled. 

"I'm going to ignore that." Miranda smirked. 

"Well I'm not." Cassidy frowned, "I can't believe you guys! I especially can't believe _you_ , mom." 

"If ghosts or telekinetics or psychics existed, Cassidy, they'd prove it. We'd know by now." Jesse reasoned, putting a calming hand on her shoulder. 

Cassidy pushed his hand away, "maybe people who see ghosts and can do telekinesis and are psychic just don't want their lives to become a spectacle. Do you ever think of that? I mean, they're real people, you know, and if they revealed those things they'd never get a moment's peace. You know how I know this?"

"Cassidy, don't be argumentative with your guest." Miranda snapped, hoping to keep her from finishing the train of thought. 

"He's not a _guest_ , he's my boyfriend and I can be argumentative with him if I want. He's going to be a politician." Cassidy said defiantly. 

"Then I want to speak with you outside." Miranda pursed her lips.

"Oh, are you kidding me?" Cassidy rolled her eyes. 

" _Now_." Miranda snarled. Once they were out of the room and Miranda closed the door, she narrowed her eyes and said, "don't. you. _dare_."

"I trust him. He's a good person." Cassidy insisted. 

"I don't trust him, not with this, not with my secrets." Miranda crossed her arms across her chest, "he may be a good person and he may be trustworthy but this secret is a huge burden to put on someone." 

"You put it on us. You put it on Andy and Caroline and me." 

"I told Andrea because of her mother. I told Caroline and you because of your father."

"You know what? I wish you hadn't ever told us about dad, I wished you'd just let us grieve and move on with our lives. It's painful every day because he's here but he's not here. I can't call him up and bitch about my day or call him when I think you're being unfair or hang out with him or hug him. I miss him so much!" 

"Oh, Cassidy..." Miranda frowned, "sweetheart, I never meant for you to feel that way. I only wanted to do what I thought was best." 

"Well maybe you don't always know what's best! Did you ever thing of that? Maybe you can be _wrong_ sometimes!" Cassidy was crying through her anger, "and where the hell is my yoga mat?"

"Your yoga mat..." Miranda repeated in a stunned, quiet voice, her eyes wide. She'd forgotten that she'd borrowed it and was caught off guard by the question. 

"Forget about it, just keep it. I'll buy a new one." Cassidy frowned and called for Jesse. Jesse emerged hesitantly, "come on, let's go for a long walk." 

Miranda sighed and rubbed her eyes tiredly. Andy appeared in the doorway, "is everything okay? I heard Cassidy yelling. Couldn't make anything out in the sitting room, though, don't worry." 

"Can we go over to Joanne's?" Miranda looked at Andy apologetically. "I think we need to call an emergency meeting regarding the reincarnation."


	13. Chapter 13

_Paris, France 1972_

_Etienne woke up and looked around. For a moment he couldn't remember where he was, but as he sat up and the cool air bit into his bare skin it all came rushing back to him. Miranda was no longer laying next to him in the bed._

_"Sorry," she called as she rushed back into the room and dove back under the covers, "I turned the heat down last night and I guess I turned it down too far. I put on a pot of coffee." She said, snuggling up to his warm body._

_"I sought you were a tea drinker." Etienne teased as he wrapped his arms around her. "I sought zat all you brits drank tea."_

_"I used to be. Sonia just keeps me going, going, going and I need something stronger than tea." She shivered a little, still trying to warm up. "I never thought modeling was hard but I've changed my mind."_

_"It's not all just standing around looking pretty?" Etienne teased._

_"I'd say that it's about 80% standing around looking pretty," Miranda laughed, "the other 20% is being tugged around by designers, seamstresses, assistants and photographers. I take a lot of direction, some of the 'visions' that the photographers have can be pretty ridiculous. Like, one photographer said to me, 'I have a vision of you doing a full split on top of a snow covered boulder. Can you do that?' And you're not supposed to say no and most of the time you do the ridiculous thing and it doesn't look the way it did in their head and they scrap it and it's annoying because you_ did _it and there's no acknowledgment about how difficult it was."_

_"You did a full split on top of a boulder?" Etienne raised an eyebrow at her._

_"And let me tell you it wasn't easy. I mean, it wasn't a real boulder, it was part of a set, but it felt like a real boulder. I walked funny for a week, I was afraid my legs were stuck like that." Miranda laughed, "and the bastard just zoomed in on my face and approved the headshot for the ad."_

_"Oh, is zat ze one where your face is glistening as ze snow falls around you?"_

_"Yes." Mirands snorted, "my forehead was glistening with sweat from the exertion and I guess in the shot it looks like I'm sparkling. I could have throttled the photographer, I almost think he was going for the headshot and was just trying to make me sweat."_

_"I never did sank you for last night," Etienne nuzzled Miranda's neck._

_"No need to thank me, I enjoyed myself too." She nipped at his shoulder. "It's been a while. It was nice to get back on the horse, so to speak." She smirked coyly._

_"You flatter me." Etienne grinned. "I'm so glad zat I ran into you last night. What a wonderful chance encounter to spark a relationship."_

_"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, tiger." Miranda patted his chest, "let's not read more into this than what it is."_

_Etienne furrowed his brow, "what is it?"_

_"It's fun. It's two friends having some fun. Right? Didn't you have fun last night?"_

_Etienne frowned, "I'm not looking for fun, Miranda. I really like you a lot and I want to be more to you than just fun."_

_"I'm not looking for a relationship right now..." Miranda bit her lip, "I like you, too, Etienne, but I don't think a relationship is what I need in my life right now."_

_"Oh. Alright." Etienne said, getting up and pulling on his clothes._

_"Hey, you're not even going to spend Christmas with me?"_

_Etienne laughed a little, "Miranda, you're jewish."_

_"Yeah, but my family always celebrated Christmas too because it's not so much a religious holiday as it is a commercial holiday and it's unifying and as immigrants it was nice to be part of the community."_

_Etienne shook his head, "I'm meeting up wis my parents at two. I'd invite you but I don't sink it would be_ fun _."_

_Miranda scowled, "you don't have to mean about it."_

_"Maybe I feel mean because I'm sad."_

_"Maybe I don't want a relationship because_ I _feel sad." Miranda crossed her arms across her chest, "maybe I just feel like I don't have myself sorted out yet and I don't want to be defined as someone's girlfriend because I'm not even sure how to define myself yet. Maybe being your girlfriend would be too easy, I'd never get to discover who I am on my own."_

_Etienne sat back down on the bed in front of Miranda. "Petite choue," he touched her face gently, "you're right zat I reacted harshly just zen, but if I am to be wis you in any capacity, I'm afraid it would have to be serious anything less and I'd be compromising how my heart feels about you. And because of zat, I don't sink we can see eachozer anymore."_

_"I'll miss you." Miranda pouted._

_"You can always come find me if you change your mind." He leaned in and kissed her lips softly. "Joyeux Noel."_

**

Joanne opened the door for Miranda and Andy before they even had a chance to knock. Miranda's message sounded so urgent that Joanne had been pacing the floor. 

Miranda walked directly into the room and looked stated, "we need to talk seriously about when to tell the girls." She tossed her clutch onto the table and took a seat in the corner of the couch. "I just had a really upsetting conversation with Cassidy." 

Lucas leaned forward, studying Miranda's face. "Wow, that's a lot of guilt. I haven't seen that much guilt in a long time..." 

"Nor have I..." Joanne bit her lip. 

"Stop studying me." Miranda pursed her lips and crossed her arms across her chest. "I think we should fly Caroline home as soon as possible and reintroduce you. I think Cassidy needs this." 

"Alright, so as soon as possible, you want me to call her?" Andy asked as she pulled out her Blackberry. 

"Hold on." Miranda put out a hand to pause her. 

"This was your idea, Miranda, why are we holding on?" Lucas demanded. 

"Because I still have the same reservations that I had before! I still think we should wait and see how long you're going to live. I don't want to give them this and then have it get taken away." 

"Jesus, Miranda, don't you think I don't have those same fears?" Lucas leaned forward confrontationally, "you're right, we don't know how long I've got which is exactly why I don't want to pussyfoot around for too long." 

Miranda stood up and looked down at him, her lip curling into a snarl, "and then what? If you die again after a week am I just supposed to pick up the pieces? I don't want them to have to lose you again."

Lucas stood up and got in Miranda's face. "Why did you even bother with this whole damn thing if you're going to fight me on every single thing?" 

"I just think we should be _cautious_." Miranda snapped, "if this goes sour _I_ have to deal with everyone's grieving, including _yours_."

Joanne and Andy glanced at each other. Neither of them particularly wanted to get into the middle of the battle of wills that was apparently going on. 

"You didn't hear Cassidy today, Lucas."

"You're right, I didn't. Because you let her boyfriend stay over instead of letting the man who's just _risen from the dead_ take respite in your mansion." 

"If we're going to expose our daughters to the potential grief I have to feel some certainty, Lucas. I don't want them to hurt anymore. I can't hurt our daughters anymore. If this isn't permanent this could destroy them. I think you're thinking of your feelings instead of theirs. You're just gungho, guns blazing want to see them without thinking about the implications of your actions. You're _selfish_." 

"No, Miranda." Lucas yelled. " _No_. I have been watching them from afar, like they're characters in a movie or sculptures in glass containers at a museum. I will be damned if you take this opportunity away from me." 

" _Selfish._ Are you even listening to yourself? I, I, I, me, me, me. There are other feelings to be considered here." Despite being nearly a foot shorter, Miranda stood fearlessly, her body language taunting, baiting and angered. 

Lucas's posture was defensive but angry. His fists clenched and unclenched as he argued with his ex-wife. "This whole damn thing was your idea! I was ready to cross over! Say what you want but you can't stop me from just going over there." 

"Don't you _dare_." Miranda was spitting venom. She moved forward aggressively and Andy reached out and grabbed her around the waist. 

"Hey, hey. Everybody let's step back and take a deep breath." Andy said soothingly, holding Miranda against her. "We can discuss this like rational adults." 

Lucas sat down disgruntledly next to Joanne and Miranda begrudgingly sat next to Andy. Andy took Miranda's hand and squeezed it. "I have to say that all-in-all, I agree with Miranda, that some cautionary measures should be taken." 

"Oh, big surprise." Lucas rolled his eyes. 

"Hey," she snapped, "I'm not finished." She waited to see if he'd interrupt again, but didn't. "Alright. Even though I see Miranda's logic and I even agree with it, if I think about it in terms of my mother or father... I have to say that I'd want to see them, even if it was only for a day, or I could only just hug them one more time." 

Joanne bit her lip and nodded, "yeah." She agreed, "if it was mama or dad, I'd want to see them and sod the consequences." 

Miranda sighed heavily. "I just don't think you all are seeing the bigger picture." Miranda insisted. "First of all, this is something that they can't share with anybody. This is a big secret and it's something that they have to keep to themselves. They can't share this with their significant others, they can't share this with a counselor. We have to make a serious decision whether or not we're putting that burden on them." 

"You're right, Miranda." Lucas said at last. 

All of the women turned to look at him with a mix of confusion and suspicion. He said it again, "you're right." 

"Which part do you agree with..." Miranda narrowed her eyes. 

"The silent burden. I think that it's essential that we consider how it effects the girls." 

"I'm suspicious of you." Miranda admitted. 

Joanne laughed, "Miranda, the man's agreeing with you. You're upset when he disagrees and when he agrees?" 

"You don't know him like I do." 

Joanne smirked, "but I'd like to."

"Gross." Miranda rolled her eyes. 

**

_Paris, France 1972 Christmas._

_Miranda spent most of the day wallowing in self-pity. She'd gone out once and was met with closed shops and restaurants and relatively desolate sidewalks._

_She had very little food in her refrigerator and had a sad meal of partially stale baguette and camembert cheese._

_Around three o'clock, Miranda found herself picking up the phone and dialing the number on instinct. When it stopped ringing she heard her father's voice on the other end, "hello, Princhek residence."_

_Miranda closed her eyes, biting her lip against breaking out into tears._

_"Miriam?" He asked softly._

_She gasped and slammed the phone back on the reciever. She wiped desperately at her eyes, trying to stay calm and erase the evidence of her having called. Suddenly the phone ringing cut through Miranda's nervous breakdown; she stared at the phone as she backed slowly away from it._

_The ringing stopped and Miranda's answering machine clicked on. "Bonjour, c'est Miranda, je ne suis pas ici, merci de me laisser votre message -- et si vous parlez l'anglais, c'est fantastique."_

_Miranda stared at the machine from the other end of the room as though it were likely to attack her if she made any sudden movements. As she waited she was met only with silence. If it had been her father calling back he was probably deterred by the use of the name Miranda and the French message. Her stomach immediately felt empty and unsettled._

_She decided to combat her anxiety and trepidations with a long soak in the bathtub. The scent of expensive lavender bath oil and steam filled the bathroom as Miranda let the water and the scents cleanse her body and mind._

_As she was drying her hair, the phone rang again. She stood in the doorway and watched the machine. After the beep she heard the voice, "hey darlin, it's Alice. I just wanted to call because I was thinking of you and it was nice to hear your voice even if it was just on the answerin machine. Alright, I always leave very long messages so I'll try and cut it short. I'm going to Sonia's New Years Eve party and I hope we'll run into each other there. Bye darlin."_

**

New York City, NY USA 2012

Miranda has slept fitfully but she counted it as a victory over insomnia nonetheless. She woke up around 8:30 and found Andy already in the kitchen with a cup of coffee and reading the newspaper. 

"Hey sleepyhead." Andy smiled. 

Miranda pouted as she poured herself a cup of coffee. She sat down next to Andy, "can I have the crossword puzzle?"

Andy had already pulled it out for her and slid it over. Miranda uncapped her pen and looked down at it with a sigh. After she filled in four or five fields she sighed again, heavier this time and dropped the pen down. She rubbed her eyes. 

Andy looked over, "I know, sweetie." She took her hand, "I know. It's not like there's a precedent for this sort of thing. There are no 'how to tell my daughters their father has come back from the dead' chapter in the parenting books." 

Miranda snorted a laugh, "I should write the 'Clairvoyant's Guide to Raising Children.' Rule number one, having a ghost monitor your child is just as bad as putting a gps in their phone." 

Andy smiled and gave Miranda's hand a squeeze, "you'll figure it out. I know that you'll do what's right for your girls. I have complete faith in you and I'll support any decision you make."

"I think I'll get Caroline on a flight out here, I'll see if she can come out today." Miranda nodded, "I thought about what you all said last night that you'd want to see your parents again even if it wasn't permanent. I let it cloud my opinion that I didn't want to see my mother but I think I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't want to see my father." 

"Did you never try to find him?" Andy asked.

"No. I think that I felt too guilty. I loved my father and he loved me and he had nothing to do with my running away like my mother and Joanne did and I felt like I didn't have the right to go back to him because I deserted him." 

"That's sad, Miranda." 

Miranda sighed, "I didn't have very much opportunity to, anyway, he died when I was in my early twenties in a machinery accident." She pushed away the crossword puzzle and held out her hand, "can I have the rest of the paper that you're not reading?"

Andy handed over the arts and entertainment, science and classifieds sections to Miranda. "Not feeling the crossword puzzle today?"

"I just don't feel like using my brain, I didn't sleep that well." Miranda skimmed the front page of the arts section. "I just kept thinking about Joanne and Lucas and it made me feel nauseous." 

Andy laughed, "that's a little extreme, isn't it? I understand not being happy about it but... come on." 

"No, I mean, it makes me nauseous because he was stone-cold _dead_ two days ago and that's far too much like touching a dead body." Miranda shivered. "I couldn't do it." 

"Well, luckily for you it's Joanne who's doing it -- or _him_ , I should say." Andy giggled. 

Miranda gagged and covered her mouth. "Please don't say that again." 

"Man, if you react that strongly, it's going to be very difficult to resist..." Andy laughed. She tapped the paper, "here, concentrate on reading and put it out of your mind."

After ten minutes had gone by and Miranda had flipped through the arts and entertainment section her eyes landed on the science section and she sucked in a breath. "I'm going to kill the bastard." 

"What?" Andy looked up, concerned. 

Miranda laid the paper on the table. The headline for the front page of the science section read Neuroscientist Faked Own Death. "Holy shit," Andy picked it up and started to read, "Lucas Gregson, two time winner of the Julius Axelrod prize for his work with cognitive neuroscience and brain mapping, announced that his death was faked. Gregson apologizes to the community and to his family for the deception but his 'death' and subsequent hiding was part of a new study." 

Andy stopped reading and looked over at Miranda. Miranda's lips were pursed and she was clearly trying to stay calm.


	14. Chapter 14

The first thing Miranda did was call Caroline and tell her that it was urgent that she come home and booked her a flight. The second thing she did was fold up the newspaper article and stick it in her purse so Cassidy couldn't read it before she had a chance to talk to her. 

The second thing she did was call Joanne. As soon as she picked up Miranda snapped, "how could you not give me a heads up?"

"I didn't know!" Joanne said defensively. "I had no idea, I was just as stunned as you when I read it this morning. He must have gone out last night while I was sleeping." 

"Is he there?"

"No, he said he was going to his lab to see if he could still get in and whatnot." 

Miranda let out a long steady breath. "I'm really angry right now."

"I can understand that." Joanne admitted. 

"This is riduclous, this can be rebuked." Miranda pursed her lips.

"He said he checked and that the funeral home that cremated him has already gone out of business and that the man who actually _did it_ is dead." 

"Lucky break..." Miranda grumbled. "When he shows up tell him to call me." 

"Tell who to call you?" Cassidy asked as she entered the kitchen. 

Miranda flipped her phone shut. "Nigel." Miranda shrugged, "I just want to catch up with him. It's been a while. Are you talking to me again?" 

"Yes." Cassidy said begrudgingly. "I guess I was a little unfair on you last night... I mean, I meant what I said, about it being really hard to have dad be sort of here but not really, but I'm sure it's hard on you, too. I love you and I'll deal."

"I love you, too, sweetheart." Miranda wrapped her arms around Cassidy and held her tightly. "Caroline's on a flight coming here, she'll be here around eleven. I need to talk to the two of you alone, can you think of something to occupy Jesse for a while?" 

**

_Paris, France 1972, New Year's Eve_

_Miranda had arrived early to the party to ensure that she wouldn't miss Alice. Sonia and her husband were greeting the guests and the room was filling up._

_"Where is your beau zis evening?" Pierrette smiled at her, holding out a cup of vodka and punch._

_"He's not my beau and, merci, but I don't really drink." She smiled weakly, she was feeling holiday partied out but she'd gone with Sonia to all of the parties she was invited to as the face of the new collection and was expected to go to the parties thrown by Sonia herself. People in the fashion industry seemed to hold an inordinate amount of parties._

_"It'll put ze color back in your cheeks." Pierrette insisted._

_Miranda accepted the drink, "merci."_

_"My husband would like to talk to you later. It was supposed to be a surprise but I cannot wait any longer. He wants to hire you for Chic. Mais oui, you can finish out your run as the face of ze winter collection, but spring shall be upon us soon and you'll be free to consider ozer options. Jean-Charles has already spoken wis Sonia about it."_

_"I'm... really flattered." Miranda was relatively speechless._

_"You have a very good eye, you're discerning and you work hard. And you started on ze seamstress side so you understand what goes into ze garments and what makes a piece good. Zere is a lot of chatter about you and we at Chic hope to snap you up. We sink you are going to very far."_

_"Merci, Pierrette. I look forward to talking with Jean-Charles later."_

_Pierrette grinned and reached out and touched Miranda's hair, "I just cannot resist zis hair."_

_"What do you think made her stand out to me?" Alice smiled. Pierrette turned and smiled to see Alice, they kissed each other's cheeks._

_They carried out a short conversation in French that Miranda didn't eaves drop on, her French was almost perfect at that point but the French speakers who knew her as the girl who spoke very little French still didn't realize her new found proficiency._

_"I'll let you two catch up." Pierrette gave Miranda's shoulder a squeeze and retreated into the crowd._

_"Hey darlin," Alice sipped her punch and sat down next to Miranda._

_"How was Bordeaux?" Miranda asked, looking down into her drink._

_"It was lovely. I stayed at Hotel de la Presse and I had a spectacular view of La Garonne."_

_Miranda nodded, "it sounds lovely... so did you have a good Christmas?"_

_Alice shrugged, "I suppose I'd have to say that I've had better. My brother's in Greece right now so he flew in and we did the Christmas thing. We ate room service at the hotel."_

_"I've had better Christmases too." Miranda pursed her lips, "I mean, I guess it's a little known fact that I do celebrate Christmas. Everyone just assumed that I didn't without even asking me and I spent the whole day alone."_

_"Oh, darlin, I'm sorry." Alice furrowed her brow._

_Miranda sipped her drink, "it wasn't just you. Although, you were the only one who called me. It was really nice to hear your voice too. Even if it was just a message."_

_"I would have liked to have spent Christmas with you."_

_"Well, at least you're spending New Year's with me."_

_Alice grinned. "Thank God for small favors, hm?" She threaded her fingers through Miranda's and gave her a squeeze._

_Jean-Charles Follet approached the women, "ah salut, Miranda, perhaps we could talk before I go back for my next drink?" He held up the half empty punch cup and smiled genially._

_"Mais oui." Miranda stood and turned to Alice. "I'll be back."_

**

Miranda, Andy and the twins were driving through Brooklyn. They'd had to take Cassidy's car because Miranda's car only seated two. Miranda was nervous riding in a car that was slate grey to match the road and the buildings around it. The color, combined with Cassidy's less than careful navigation kept Miranda's eyes squeeze shut and her hand clutching Andy's until they arrived at Joanne's. 

Miranda had decided that the best way to approach the current situation was to get all the players in a group meeting and to clear the air once and for all. 

The girls were nervous that Miranda refused to give any clues about why she flew Caroline home suddenly and somberly led them to the car. 

Joanne let them in wordlessly and Miranda sat with the girls on the couch. Andy and Joanne sat together on the love seat. 

Miranda stroked each girl's hair gently. "I have to tell you girls something about your father." She took a deep breath, "I know that it's going to be hard to believe but I'm just going to come right out with it: your father has been risen from the dead."

Cassidy and Caroline stared at Miranda for a few long moments and then scoffed. 

"Lucas," Miranda called, "you want to come out now?" 

Lucas stepped out of the kitchen and by the time he walked up to the couch the girls were both in tears. "You've got to be shitting me..." Caroline mumbled.

"Language, Caroline," Lucas scolded playfully. He held out his arms, "can I please hug you?" 

**

_Paris, France 1972_

_Miranda found Alice sitting on the chaise where she left her. She sat down, "I'm stunned," she turned to look at her, "Jean-Charles Follet is giving me a job. I have no qualifications."_

_"What are you talking about?" Alice snorted, "darlin, you've been on all three sides of the fashion world in about six months. You went from an outsider to a seamstress to a model. I can't imagine anyone more uniquely qualified for a job at Chic."_

_"I guess. I just... I didn't even get to graduate high school."_

_"You're smart as a whip and you don't need any piece of paper to prove that."_

_Miranda laughed, "I don't know if I'm in a state of shock, or what, but I was just given this great job but I don't even care because right now I'm just... so glad to see you."_

_Alice blushed a little, "you have no idea how much I missed you." She admitted._

_Someone in the crowd shouted to announce the approach of midnight. Within moments the entire room was shouting the countdown in French. When the countdown ended the room was flooded with auld lang sang and couples kissed each other._

_Miranda turned impulsively and pressed her lips to Alice's. For a moment Alice was stunned but soon cupped Miranda's cheeks and parted her lips for Miranda to deepen the kiss._

_Reluctantly they separated. "I've thought about that for so long." Alice whispered, "after we kissed that night... it's all I can think of... all I can dream of..."_

_"I want you to come home with me tonight. Will you?" Miranda asked breathlessly._

_**_

_As soon as the two were through the door of the apartment they embraced each other and resumed the kiss where they'd left off. Miranda pushed Alice back against the door while Alice struggled to divest Miranda of her shirt._

_Miranda pulled them toward the bedroom and pushed Alice onto the bed. Miranda pulled her shirt and bra off and climbed over Alice. Alice's hands cupped and kneaded Miranda's breasts. Miranda moaned, moving against her hands. Alice's fingers gently squeezed her nipples and Miranda gasped out a moan. Alice leaned up and sucked one of the sensitive buds._

_Miranda squirmed and pushed Alice's skirt up around her waist, running her fingers up Alice's inner thighs. Alice's muscled trembled as she lifted up to Miranda's touch. Miranda pulled Alice's panties down around her knees and pushed three fingers into her._

_Alice gasped and groaned, arching her back and thrusting her hips against Miranda's ministrations. Alice squeezed her eyes shut and gripped handfuls of the sheets as she rolled her hips._

_Miranda's fingers pushed deeply into Alice, Miranda moaned as she felt Alice's muscles starting to contract around her. Alice started to whimper and thrash and finally cried out as her orgasm washed over her._

_Miranda sat back on her heels as she watched Alice recovering. Alice reached out for Miranda and when Miranda took her hand she was yanked down and Alice covered her body with her own. Alice's lips were all over her neck and chest before trailing down her stomach pausing only to pull Miranda's pants and underwear off and toss them aside._

_Miranda buried her fingers in Alice's hair and thought that she was going to combust as Alice's tongue first made contact with her clit. Alice's tongue glided over the hyper sensitive bundle of nerves and Miranda whimpered._

_Miranda lifted her hips to keep Alice's face pressed as tightly as possible to her warm centre. Alice's tongue swirled and pressed and lapped. Miranda wrapped her leg around Alice and dug her nails as she neared orgasm._

**

New York City, NY USA 2012

Miranda rolled over on the bed and looked over at Andy who still had her eyes tightly shut. "Penny for your thoughts?"

"God, I'll give you my whole bank account for what you just did to my body..." Andy turned to face Miranda. "I think the old Miranda's back." 

Miranda grinned and nodded, "I feel like my life is on the right track again. I feel like I'm me again." 

"Yeah, it's been a hell of a two weeks, hasn't it?" Andy drew lazy circles on Miranda's shoulder. "You raised your ex-husband from the dead, our houseguest has gone home, Caroline and Cassidy have been catching up with Lucas, and..." 

"Joanne and Lucas are having a torrid affair. You can say it." Miranda rolled her eyes and Andy laughed. Miranda shrugged, "I'm happy for them, I really am." 

"You still foresee disaster?"

"Always." Miranda smirked, "but I hope I'm wrong." 

Andy was about to say something when she heard her phone vibrating. She picked it up and looked at the caller id. "It's Joanne, is your phone off?"

Miranda grinned, "yup." 

Andy flipped her phone open, "hello?" She listened, and nodded, "yeah, just give us half an hour and we'll be right over. See you soon. Bye." 

"Something wrong?" Miranda looked concerned. 

"No. Joanne just thought it would be nice to have everyone for dinner since Caroline has to go back to school tomorrow." 

**

Andy stood next to Miranda at Joanne's door. Andy didn't think there was anything wrong with her wardrobe or her sense of style (post-Runway, of course) but on occasion standing next to Miranda made her feel bad about clothing. Miranda looked stunning, as she always did; she was dressed in a cerulean blue Diane von Furstenburg Kimono wrap dress with a pair of Miu Miu belted platform boots. She was stunning, she was always stunning. 

Cassidy opened the door for them. Miranda stooped -- she was about four inches taller than her barefoot daughter in her heeled boots -- and hugged her. "Hey sweetheart," she kissed her temple, "I've missed you recently."

"Hey mom," Caroline came up and hugged her mother too.

"And you, I always miss because you decided to go to college out of state, you brat." Miranda gave Caroline a squeeze. The girls greeted Andy. 

Miranda wandered into the kitchen as she heard the girls and Andy strike up a conversation. Joanne was standing at the stove stirring something. Joanne turned and saw her and smiled hugely. The woman had more color in her cheeks and her smile was even more infectious than ever. Miranda had to admit that Lucas was clearly doing something good for her. Joanne hugged her tightly. 

Lucas got up from the table, "where's my hug?"

"I didn't bring you one." Miranda teased. 

"Oh, come on," he laughed as he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed. 

"Don't hurt her." Joanne laughed. 

"She's fine. She's not a fabrigee egg." Lucas laughed but suddenly stopped laughing and started choking. "I... can't..."

"Are you okay?" Joanne rushed to Lucas, she rubbed his back. "Miranda, do-" she stopped short as she saw Miranda gasping for breath as well. "Andy! Girls! I think something's wrong!"


	15. Chapter 15

_Paris, France 1973_

_As Miranda was waking up on the first day of the new year, her bangs still matted to her forehead by sweat from the night's activities, she took a deep breath, feeling her lungs fill up with fresh air. She looked over to the other side of the bed, it was still dissheveled but Alice was no where to be seen._

_"Alice?" She called and as she stood up from the bed she saw that Alice's clothes were gone from the floor. Her heart pounded, she already knew that Alice was gone._

_She quickly threw on an outfit and grabbed her keys and was out the door like a shot. She ran down the street, ran down the block and ran all the way to the salon. Her legs moving her forward through sheer panic and dread._

_When she skidded to a halt in front of the salon and had to pause to catch her breath she looked in and saw Sonia's personal assistant._

_Miranda entered the salon and the bell rang. "Oh, bonjour Miranda," Emmanuelle greeted her, "you're not working, are you? I sought zat only personal slaves were called upon to work on ze holidays."_

_Miranda shook her head, still in a state of shock. "No, I'm not working... I was looking for Alice."_

_"Oh, Sonia said zat she quit."_

_"Oh my god..." Miranda muttered sliding down the wall and landing with a soft thud on the floor._

_"I guess she turned in her notice around Christmas time." Emmanuelle shrugged, turning back to her packing, "her replacement seems good zough. He's swiss, I sink."_

_Miranda stopped listening to Emmanuelle as she continued to describe the Swiss tailor. Miranda had a sinking feeling in her stomach and hadn't felt so suddenly overcome with nausea since she'd been pregnant._

_Miranda brought her knees up and rested her forehead against them. When she lifted her head she saw the tear stains on her pants and reached up to wipe them away from her face. She held her face in her hands and sobbed, despite her best efforts not to._

_In a fit of anger she kicked a small stack of boxes with a grunt. Emmanuelle stopped talking and looked over, noticing Miranda's state for the first time. "Were you close?" She asked sympathetically._

_"No." Miranda snapped, her voice nasal from congestion. She shook her head and rubbed her eyes, "no, she always kept me at arm's length. Even... even when we... Christ, I've been so_ stupid _." Miranda cursed herself, kicking the box again for emphasis._

_Emmanuelle remained silent, not wanting to provoke Miranda unnecessarily._

_Miranda looked up, her eyes were red and puffy. "Do you know what it feels like to be completely_ alone _?" Miranda asked, "to have everyone you care about leave you? It doesn't matter how much you love them, how much you care about them or how badly you want them. They all abandon you anyway..."_

_"Can I get you somesing?" Emmanuelle asked gently. Sonia was always sending her to fetch things for Miranda. Sonia sent a lot of people to fetch things for the face of her collection._

_Miranda shook her head. "No... thank you." Miranda pushed herself up off the floor and headed toward the door._

_"Sonia's having a Resolutions dinner tonight." Emmanuelle said as Miranda's hand gripped the door knob. "Are you supposed to go to zat?"_

_Miranda shrugged, "I guess I am."_

_"You won't be alone tonight zen." Emmanuelle smiled encouragingly._

_Miranda cast her a sidelong glare as she left the salon. The door closed behind her and she heard the muffled bell. A cold wind kicked up and Miranda wrapped her coat tighter around her body and sighed heavily._

**

Miranda had sunk down to the floor and was trying to take in deep, calm breaths. Lucas was choking harder and was clutching at Joanne as he struggled. 

"I called 911." Andy said as she sunk down to the floor with Miranda. 

The girls paced nervously, watching their parents fighting for breath. 

Miranda felt a strange sense of calm, she wasn't worried as Andy gripped her hand. She looked up at the girls and even managed a small reassuring smile. 

Joanne stroked Lucas's forehead, "try to be calm, see Miranda?" 

"Not surprising," Miranda croaked, her lips quirked in a teasing smile, "I've always been better than him at everything." Her voice was hoarse.

"Try to save your strength for breathing," Andy insisted. 

Miranda gave Andy's hand a gentle squeeze. "I'm going to be okay, Andrea." She held out a hand to Lucas. He grasped it in his own. "I feel your life force draining." She whispered gravelly. 

He nodded, "me too." He croaked. "It's okay." 

Joanne had tears in her eyes as she watched Lucas. He looked over at her and leaned his forehead against hers. "It's okay." He repeated, barely above a whisper. 

Cassidy ran to let the EMTs in and as they rushed into the room and moved to Lucas, he was already gone. When the other EMT went to help Miranda she had already regained her ability to breathe. 

Andy took the girls home to the townhouse and Miranda waited with Joanne for the coroner to arrive. Joanne sat against the cabinets and Miranda sat next to her, holding her hand tightly. Joanne wiped at her eyes. "Can you tell him I love him?" 

Miranda sniffled and felt tears slide down her cheeks, she shook her head, "he's not here. I don't see him. I think he crossed over." 

Joanne buried her face in Miranda's shoulder. Miranda wrapped her arms around her older sister and held her firmly. Miranda heard strangled sobs coming from Joanne and she kissed the top of her head. "I think he crossed over because he's been so happy. He was happy to have been able to be with you and happy to have gotten the girls back. He was ready." 

"I wasn't..." Joanne coughed. "I mean, what happened?" 

Miranda shrugged, "I don't know. You know just about as much about what I do as I do." Miranda stroked Joanne's hair. "I'm sure he knows that you love him. He loves you too." 

"You don't know that." Joanne whispered solemnly. 

Miranda snorted, "I do know. It was plain to see. You were a big part of his happiness, you completed the life that he was meant to lead." 

"I guess so." Joanne whispered. 

Miranda looked up and -- much to her chagrin -- saw Alda watching the women from the doorway. "How long have you been here?" Joanne looked up and Miranda clarified, "mama's here." 

Alda shrugged, "I thought I felt you passing." 

"You did." Miranda confirmed.

Alda looked down at Lucas and then looked over at Joanne. "I just want my daughter to be happy." She said finally. 

"She was." Miranda nodded, "and she will be again." 

"I want you to be happy, too." Alda admitted, "I don't hate you. You bothered me and your existence reminded me of the oppression I felt, but I did _love_ you."

Miranda's mouth was open in surprise. 

"When you left the house -- when I _kicked you out of the house_..." she trailed off for a moment, "I never dreamed that you wouldn't come back and... I'm sorry that your baby died." 

Miranda squeezed her eyes shut and felt a tear roll down her cheek. 

"And your daughters are beautiful. I wish that I'd been nicer to you so that I could have known them." Alda professed. 

"Bitte schon, mama." Miranda was stunned, "that all really means a lot to me." Miranda watched as Alda smiled reservedly and disappeared. 

Joanne lifted her head again. "What did she say?" 

"She said... that she was sorry." Miranda's voice was soft and distant. "I think she crossed over." 

Joanne gave her a squeeze. "I love you, Miri." 

"I love you, too, Joanne."


End file.
